Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I was in a house with my family. It was daytime, and the house was filled with yellowish natural light. I may have been in the kitchen. All the surfaces in the room were white, tinged yellow with the sunlight.
I may have heard, or I may have been thinking about having heard, some announcement on the radio that there was going to be a nuclear war. Something about the announcement made it seem like nuclear war was inevitable, and that it was going to happen soon, but that it wasn't going to happen now, and it wasn't going to happen without plenty of warning.
But now my oldest nephew ran into the kitchen. He said, "The nuclear war is beginning! They just made the announcement! The missiles are on their way!" My nephew ran through the kitchen and down a stairwell that led to the basement. My mom was down in the basement,and my nephew was going to give my mom the warning, too.
I thought for a moment. How could we escape the blast of a nuclear bomb? Perhaps just staying in the basement would be a good idea. Maybe the basement was deep enough to shield us. But I didn't feel like that was right at all.
After some more reflection, I decided that if the bomb were to hit, we'd all just be screwed. The best thing wasn't to hide. It was just not to act afraid when the final moments came.
But I kept thinking that maybe my nephew was kidding. Maybe he just wanted to play a game on us and panic us. Or maybe he'd heard the news wrong, or heard a bad piece of news.
I looked out the back window. I looked way down, as if I were in a ten-story building, to a valley in the mountains. The valley was like the backyard for this house. But I could feel now that the house was all by itself.
Down in the valley was a flying saucer. It was silvery, and it looked a bit like computer animation. I knew that my nephew had run down into the flying saucer. He was going to fly it, apparently. This showed me he'd been serious about the nuclear missile attack. He was going to fly away and warn everybody he could about our impending doom.
The saucer floated up into the air, wobbling back and forth a little as it rose. It then rather quickly flew off toward the horizon of the yellow sky. But I suddenly realized that I was controlling the flight of the saucer, either with my thoughts or with a machine, as if I were watching a movie.
I kept on rewinding and playing the flight of the saucer, watching it fly away, then pulling it back. I think I even saw glitchy, little lines in my field of view, as if I were watching a VCR tape and had it on pause. I'd convinced myself through this manipulation that all the panic I'd experienced up to this point was just a movie, nothing more.
Dream #2
I was going to see a friend give a speech. My friend's speech was for her doctorate. I don't know whether the speech was so she could get her doctorate, or so she could get into a class that would get her her doctorate.
The room my friend was to give a speech in was about the size of a small classroom. It was really nice, with tall, narrow windows letting in plenty of yellowy sunlight. The room was packed with professional and academic looking people.
Sometimes my friend stood near me, and sometimes I saw her standing and talking to some people. She looked like Julie Potratz, the star of a couple of films by Laurel Nakadate.
An older, Asian woman may have been in charge of everything going on here. Apparently there were going to be a number of speeches given. It was hard for me to tell whether my friend would actually be giving a speech. It seemed like a lot of people were going to give speeches about her work. And one person was even going to give a speech that had been written by my friend. But I couldn't tell whether my friend was going to give a speech herself.
The first speech had begun. My friend and I were standing at our chairs in one of the rows near the front of the audience. But everybody else was standing, and they all seemed so much bigger than we. It was hard to see the podium. I felt crowded in, hidden from everything.
My friend stood to my left. She seemed to be annoyed at me for some reason. To my right stood an Asian woman. She said to my friend, "I know you wished you could stay here. Too bad you have to go in order to catch your flight. You won't have time enough to give your speech after all, it seems."
Some time had passed, and the event had possibly ended. Everybody was now clearing out of the room. I was either myself or my friend. A young man came into the room and asked me if I knew somebody from my past named MA. I said I did. The young man said that that man was part of a group that had been organized to stalk me. The young man was coming clean with the info. He'd been a part of the whole thing. But now he felt I should stop it, if I could.
Either the man had told me or I had just known that MA, or somebody associated with MA, was out in the hallway. I walked outside, into a lobby-like hallway. Right in the hallway was a small, stage-like platform that was about knee-high.
MA sat on the platform, leaning against a column, with his legs stretched out along the platform. He was totally relaxed and complacent. I confronted him and asked him why he'd been stalking me. He just didn't answer.
I got up on the stage and knelt over MA. I began punching him. But he didn't seem to care. I told him that if he wasn't going to stop stalking me, I was going to destroy him physically, right now.
I was still either myself or my female friend. But now MA also looked a lot like my female friend. But I had bashed her face in. She was totally mutilated. I said something to her like, "See? This is what I can do to you if you don't stop!"
By this time I was no longer mad. It was more like I was illustrating something to MA. I pulled some photos out and showed them to her. They were black and white photos of some blonde movie star with her face completely disfigured. In one case, one of her cheeks was missing, exposing her gums -- most of her teeth were gone -- to the camera.
MA stood up and walked away. I was calling after him, talking to him about the photos. Now that I thought about the photos a little, I hoped that I hadn't actually done anything to MA. I hadn't really had proof that MA had been stalking me. Even if I'd had proof, should I really have done something like that to him?
Dream #3
Something about a fire somewhere. The fire had something to do with the name "le.i. revolution" or "le.i. cherry." A woman had given the news out about the fire. She'd been wearing a lot of mascara. Now her eyes had huge, black circles around them. But it wasn't like she'd been crying. It was more like she'd sustained some injury, and been through some kind of flood of water, that had caused her eyes to act in this way.
Dream #4
I was out on the edge of a lake at night. A fire truck that actually looked like a 1950s-style tow truck, was positioned above the water somehow.
The woman was on the roof of the truck, laying on it, stomach down, and clutching to it. Behind her, in the bed of the truck, were all kinds of old, rusty, metal objects. The woman was the same woman from the previous dream: young, blonde, pale, and kind of punky looiking. Her mascara wasn't running all over the place now, though.
The woman had told some man up above her that the "le.i. cherry" or "le.i. revolution" fire had occurred. It had affected the truck in some way. So now the truck was too damaged to use anymore. In fact, it may even have been possible that the truck itself was going to catch fire at any minute.
So the woman was having the man lower the truck down into the lake. The truck was attached by a thick, kind of rusty chain to some huge crane, which was dropping it into the water. The woman clung to the truck's roof, looking back up to the man and saying goodbye to him. The man was kind of fat and old, with a mustache and stubble. But it was plain the woman loved the man and was telling him goodbye.
I yelled to the woman, "Why do you need to die? Why do you even need to drop the truck into the lake? The truck might still work? Why don't you work on the truck and see if you can fix it, instead of just giving up on it?"
The woman said, "No, no. We don't do that. When a ship's going down, a captain goes down with his ship."
I could now see that both the woman and the man were holding to the top of the truck as it was being lowered into the lake. They were both planning to drown themselves with their fire truck. The fact that both the man and the woman were going to kill themselves made me feel less upset about the whole situation.
Monday, March 5, 2012
Sunday, March 4, 2012
nuclear bomb talk
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I was walking across a street intersection. It was a grey and dim day. The streets may possibly have been wet, as if it had been raining. A car pulled in front of me and then turned off to the left. I looked off to my left to see that a few cars were parked in a line, as if this area were a parking lot, not an intersection.
I was now on a grassy hillside with a young woman. We were near the crest of the hill, but not quite to it. A wide, leafy tree stood off to my right. I knelt on the ground, looking at the short grass. The woman stood higher up on the hill, looking down toward me.
I told the woman how when the nuclear bomb attack came -- I think we were expecting one rather soon -- the first thing that would happen would be a bomber plane would fly over us and drop whole plane-loads of babies.
After the babies were dropped, we would see the nuclear bomb blasts. I believe the thought was that the nuclear bombs would be released at a far distance from the sites where the babies had been dropped. But the nuclear bombs would be so powerful that we'd see them as distant, red glows from far away.
Still, something about the babies being dropped didn't make sense to me. The babies, I knew, would be from the attacking country. So why would the country want to attack all its babies?
I told the woman how if you were far enough away from a nuclear bomb, you didn't have to worry. But you had to be pretty far away to be safe. And if you weren't far enough away, you wouldn't have time to escape. You'd be hit before you knew it.
I told the woman how almost as soon as the bomb hits, the mushroom cloud expands. This, apparently, was the effective range of the nuclear bomb. But I told the woman how the cloud is miles and miles wide, and how it expands to that width almost instantaneously.
Dream #1
I was walking across a street intersection. It was a grey and dim day. The streets may possibly have been wet, as if it had been raining. A car pulled in front of me and then turned off to the left. I looked off to my left to see that a few cars were parked in a line, as if this area were a parking lot, not an intersection.
I was now on a grassy hillside with a young woman. We were near the crest of the hill, but not quite to it. A wide, leafy tree stood off to my right. I knelt on the ground, looking at the short grass. The woman stood higher up on the hill, looking down toward me.
I told the woman how when the nuclear bomb attack came -- I think we were expecting one rather soon -- the first thing that would happen would be a bomber plane would fly over us and drop whole plane-loads of babies.
After the babies were dropped, we would see the nuclear bomb blasts. I believe the thought was that the nuclear bombs would be released at a far distance from the sites where the babies had been dropped. But the nuclear bombs would be so powerful that we'd see them as distant, red glows from far away.
Still, something about the babies being dropped didn't make sense to me. The babies, I knew, would be from the attacking country. So why would the country want to attack all its babies?
I told the woman how if you were far enough away from a nuclear bomb, you didn't have to worry. But you had to be pretty far away to be safe. And if you weren't far enough away, you wouldn't have time to escape. You'd be hit before you knew it.
I told the woman how almost as soon as the bomb hits, the mushroom cloud expands. This, apparently, was the effective range of the nuclear bomb. But I told the woman how the cloud is miles and miles wide, and how it expands to that width almost instantaneously.
Saturday, March 3, 2012
bus and ferry; bees on hands
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I was in a huge parking lot that was probably out in the middle of a forest. I had probably been on a big bus. But the bus had broken down. I had a few of my bags out on the asphalt beside the bus. A few other people were probably also standing outside the bus with me.
There was another bus. I got onto it. It was now heading away. It had driven off the parking lot and was just now starting to head up a forest road. I was probably standing near the front of the bus, asking the bus driver, a woman, if this bus was going to the right place. The woman probably told me yes.
I was a little uneasy about taking the bus, even still. I didn't want to go to the wrong place. But I figured the woman knew what she was talking about. I should just relax and listen to her.
Now I remembered that I'd left my bags out by the first bus. I hadn't forgotten them there: I'd left them there for a reason. But now I began to feel a bit uneasy about it. I didn't want people stealing my bags. Before, I'd felt like I could trust them there. I was still trying to maintain that trust. But I couldn't I was too afraid somebody would steal my bags.
I asked to be let off the bus. I hurried back to the first bus. But now the bus was something like a white ferry-boat.
The boat must have been docked sideways, because I could see a lot of the side of the boat. It went up about three levels, and the sides were all open. There were a lot of people sitting on all the levels of the boat. Many of them may have been dressed up in white suits, like something people from the late 1800s or early 1900s may have worn.
I heard somebody calling my name from one of the higher up levels. It sounded like kids. I figured the kids were my nephews. But I knew they were different people. (I may have thought of myself as a different person at this point, possibly even as some attractive, wealthy, young woman.) I also knew that the kids were purposely calling in a voice that would taunt and scare me.
Eventually a narrator's voice began talking about why the kids were using the scary voice. The person I had been was now a person I was aware of in the third-person. She was a woman getting onto the ferry.
The narrator said that the children were trying to scare the woman off the ferry. But the woman wouldn't be scared: partly because she knew the kids and wouldn't be scared by them; and partly because the business she had to take care of by getting onto the ferry boat was too important.
Dream #2
I was out in an open field on a sunny day. The field may have been a bit rolling, not a level lawn. My views were often of looking up or down a slight incline of lawn.
I was with my three-year-old niece, probably my mom, and possibly some of my other relatives. My niece had gotten something sweet and sticky on her hands. A bee was now attracted to her.
My niece was afraid of the bee. But I told her not to be afraid. I said that the bee would most likely just land on her, gather a bit of the honey (I'm not sure I said "honey"), and fly away. But, I told my niece, if she panicked, the bee would also panic and sting her.
The bee, which was pretty big, maybe 5cm long, landed on my niece's hand or arm. It was pretty calm, although it kept on waggling its rear end so that I thought it might actually sting my niece. But my niece stayed calm.
But now a bee flew onto my hand or arm. Apparently I had sweet, sticky stuff on me, too! As soon as I saw the bee land on me, I began flinching and waving my arms. I may even have begun running around -- maybe even rolling around! -- in a panic, trying to get the bee off of me. I was sure it was going to sting me.
Dream #1
I was in a huge parking lot that was probably out in the middle of a forest. I had probably been on a big bus. But the bus had broken down. I had a few of my bags out on the asphalt beside the bus. A few other people were probably also standing outside the bus with me.
There was another bus. I got onto it. It was now heading away. It had driven off the parking lot and was just now starting to head up a forest road. I was probably standing near the front of the bus, asking the bus driver, a woman, if this bus was going to the right place. The woman probably told me yes.
I was a little uneasy about taking the bus, even still. I didn't want to go to the wrong place. But I figured the woman knew what she was talking about. I should just relax and listen to her.
Now I remembered that I'd left my bags out by the first bus. I hadn't forgotten them there: I'd left them there for a reason. But now I began to feel a bit uneasy about it. I didn't want people stealing my bags. Before, I'd felt like I could trust them there. I was still trying to maintain that trust. But I couldn't I was too afraid somebody would steal my bags.
I asked to be let off the bus. I hurried back to the first bus. But now the bus was something like a white ferry-boat.
The boat must have been docked sideways, because I could see a lot of the side of the boat. It went up about three levels, and the sides were all open. There were a lot of people sitting on all the levels of the boat. Many of them may have been dressed up in white suits, like something people from the late 1800s or early 1900s may have worn.
I heard somebody calling my name from one of the higher up levels. It sounded like kids. I figured the kids were my nephews. But I knew they were different people. (I may have thought of myself as a different person at this point, possibly even as some attractive, wealthy, young woman.) I also knew that the kids were purposely calling in a voice that would taunt and scare me.
Eventually a narrator's voice began talking about why the kids were using the scary voice. The person I had been was now a person I was aware of in the third-person. She was a woman getting onto the ferry.
The narrator said that the children were trying to scare the woman off the ferry. But the woman wouldn't be scared: partly because she knew the kids and wouldn't be scared by them; and partly because the business she had to take care of by getting onto the ferry boat was too important.
Dream #2
I was out in an open field on a sunny day. The field may have been a bit rolling, not a level lawn. My views were often of looking up or down a slight incline of lawn.
I was with my three-year-old niece, probably my mom, and possibly some of my other relatives. My niece had gotten something sweet and sticky on her hands. A bee was now attracted to her.
My niece was afraid of the bee. But I told her not to be afraid. I said that the bee would most likely just land on her, gather a bit of the honey (I'm not sure I said "honey"), and fly away. But, I told my niece, if she panicked, the bee would also panic and sting her.
The bee, which was pretty big, maybe 5cm long, landed on my niece's hand or arm. It was pretty calm, although it kept on waggling its rear end so that I thought it might actually sting my niece. But my niece stayed calm.
But now a bee flew onto my hand or arm. Apparently I had sweet, sticky stuff on me, too! As soon as I saw the bee land on me, I began flinching and waving my arms. I may even have begun running around -- maybe even rolling around! -- in a panic, trying to get the bee off of me. I was sure it was going to sting me.
Thursday, March 1, 2012
got mad at mom and threw up
Good morning, everybody.
A pretty bad night last night. I was woken not long after I'd fallen asleep, and I couldn't get back to sleep until about an hour before my usual waking up time.
I was running over and over the bad parts of my day. I've been starting to feel secure at my new job. Then on Monday a few things happened to make me think I might end up being unemployed all over again. And then one of my best friends was having a really hard time. So she spoke with me on the phone. But I wasn't too receptive toward her. So I dwelt on my bad attitude for a while last night, too.
Dream #1
I was inside a house. I had an argument with my mom. My sister may have been watching the argument. She may have been surprised at the way I was acting towards my mom.
I ran out of the house. It was night. It was more like I was in front of a smallish, cheaply built apartment building than a house. The sidewalk was small, too, and looked out on a slightly busy street, even though I couldn't see any traffic -- just dark, black sky. There was probably a semi truck and trailer off to my right.
I was wearing a hooded jacket. The hood was drawn tight around my head, even though it wasn't too cold outside. I had gotten sick. I bent over the curb of the sidewalk and began throwing up in the gutter.
A pretty bad night last night. I was woken not long after I'd fallen asleep, and I couldn't get back to sleep until about an hour before my usual waking up time.
I was running over and over the bad parts of my day. I've been starting to feel secure at my new job. Then on Monday a few things happened to make me think I might end up being unemployed all over again. And then one of my best friends was having a really hard time. So she spoke with me on the phone. But I wasn't too receptive toward her. So I dwelt on my bad attitude for a while last night, too.
Dream #1
I was inside a house. I had an argument with my mom. My sister may have been watching the argument. She may have been surprised at the way I was acting towards my mom.
I ran out of the house. It was night. It was more like I was in front of a smallish, cheaply built apartment building than a house. The sidewalk was small, too, and looked out on a slightly busy street, even though I couldn't see any traffic -- just dark, black sky. There was probably a semi truck and trailer off to my right.
I was wearing a hooded jacket. The hood was drawn tight around my head, even though it wasn't too cold outside. I had gotten sick. I bent over the curb of the sidewalk and began throwing up in the gutter.
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
seeing old boss; seventh day religion; imperiled X-15; mediocre musical
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I had to go back to one of my old jobs for some reason or another, probably to pick up some kind of paperwork.
I had gone up an elevator and was now in one of the high-up floors of the building. I walked through a hallway that seemed to be an extension of the elevator bank. The hallway was kind of dim, with cherry-colored wood walls and grey floors. I could see that the hallway opened out to a wide office floor, which seemed to be mostly unlit by electric light, but pretty well lit by greyish natural light.
The hallway was filled with people, mostly young people, all bustling about. Amid these people, I saw my old boss, BS, walking into the bathroom. I thought I might say hi to him. But I reflected how he was always so reluctant to talk to me. So I didn't say anything. Nevertheless, he may have stopped in the threshold when he saw me. I may have waved to him quickly.
Dream #2
I was in a huge, empty room with some other guy, a kind of tall, muscular, young, white man wearing a t-shirt, khaki shorts, and a cap. We were both walking counter-clockwise around some cubic, concrete fixture in the floor. The fixture looked a bit like an altar. But it had an aluminum toilet seat and basin in its center.
As we walked around the altar-toilet, the man was talking to me about some religion. He gave some name that sounded like a mix between "Seventh Day Adventist" and "Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints." The man was making it sound like the people who practiced this religion were really bad, and like they were actually planning to do bad things.
But, I thought, people in generaly usually had a prejudice against people from this religion. At the same time, they also thought highly of people from this religion. Now the man was talking about how good the work ethic was for the people from this religion.
As the man spoke about this, I was cleaning off the toilet seat. It seemed like there was a lot of grime and hair on the seat. I was wiping it off with a piece of toilet paper. But I don't think I knew where to put the paper.
The man mentioned some kind of eating habit the religious people had. It had to do with only eating at a specific time on a specific day of the week. The rest of the day was devoted to work. But the man said you could always spot a lazy guy in this religion by the way he works and the way he eats.
The man seemed to be trying to disparage the whole religion with his comment. But after he'd gotten most of the way through his comment, he stopped himself and commented on how well most people in the religion stuck to this regular eating and working ritual.
Dream #3
Either I, I and some other man, or some man, was watching a news feed, either on TV or on a computer. An aircraft that was supposed to be an X-15 rocket, but which really looked like a black-and-yellow painted space shuttle, was getting ready to land.
The vehicle descended slowly through the blue sky. It landed on a faded tarmac strip. The landing seemed to go well. But the X-15 was damaged somehow, and everybody knew it was in danger.
The X-15 began skidding off to the left. It coasted off the tarmac, onto some grass, and finally stopped beside a chain-link fence. My view of all this was now from within the scene, as if I were floating above it in a helicopter.
Everybody was now thinking that the X-15 had been internally damaged and that it was going to explode. A crew of workers had come up to the X-15 to pull the crew members out of the vehicle before it exploded.
The X-15 now looked like a big Hummer or a big pick-up truck. The crew members were all crammed together in the front and back seats. They all looked like tourists in their fifties, kind of overweight, wearing nice jeans and shirts. They looked like they were all having a good, easygoing time, even though they were being pulled out of explosive wreckage.
Most of the flight crew and rescue crew had gotten away from the X-15. But now a different group of people came up to the vehicle. It was a group of old women, maybe in their sixties. They all thought this wreckage was a wonderful tourist attraction, and that they might sit around in it. By this time, the X-15 really just looked like a big, yellow, pick-up truck with no roof.
I saw the back end of the vehicle burst out with a jet of steam. I knew that the rest of the vehicle would probably now explode in a fireball. I may have seen one small, fiery explosion. But the old ladies didn't even seem to feel it. They were doing things like taking pictures of themselves on their phones.
Dream #4
Some guy was telling me how he thought some musical was only okay. I may have felt bad about this, because I may have been the one to introduce him to the movie of the musical.
The man said the musical all began well enough, but that by the end of the musical, everything about it seemed so shockingly racist. Plus, the actual quality of the drama and the songs just got cheaper and cheaper.
The man may have said that the turning point in the musical for him was the song "When You're a Jet." I then realized that the man was probably talking about the musical West Side Story. It surprised me that I'd introduced this musical to somebody, since I'd never been a really big fan of it.
Dream #1
I had to go back to one of my old jobs for some reason or another, probably to pick up some kind of paperwork.
I had gone up an elevator and was now in one of the high-up floors of the building. I walked through a hallway that seemed to be an extension of the elevator bank. The hallway was kind of dim, with cherry-colored wood walls and grey floors. I could see that the hallway opened out to a wide office floor, which seemed to be mostly unlit by electric light, but pretty well lit by greyish natural light.
The hallway was filled with people, mostly young people, all bustling about. Amid these people, I saw my old boss, BS, walking into the bathroom. I thought I might say hi to him. But I reflected how he was always so reluctant to talk to me. So I didn't say anything. Nevertheless, he may have stopped in the threshold when he saw me. I may have waved to him quickly.
Dream #2
I was in a huge, empty room with some other guy, a kind of tall, muscular, young, white man wearing a t-shirt, khaki shorts, and a cap. We were both walking counter-clockwise around some cubic, concrete fixture in the floor. The fixture looked a bit like an altar. But it had an aluminum toilet seat and basin in its center.
As we walked around the altar-toilet, the man was talking to me about some religion. He gave some name that sounded like a mix between "Seventh Day Adventist" and "Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints." The man was making it sound like the people who practiced this religion were really bad, and like they were actually planning to do bad things.
But, I thought, people in generaly usually had a prejudice against people from this religion. At the same time, they also thought highly of people from this religion. Now the man was talking about how good the work ethic was for the people from this religion.
As the man spoke about this, I was cleaning off the toilet seat. It seemed like there was a lot of grime and hair on the seat. I was wiping it off with a piece of toilet paper. But I don't think I knew where to put the paper.
The man mentioned some kind of eating habit the religious people had. It had to do with only eating at a specific time on a specific day of the week. The rest of the day was devoted to work. But the man said you could always spot a lazy guy in this religion by the way he works and the way he eats.
The man seemed to be trying to disparage the whole religion with his comment. But after he'd gotten most of the way through his comment, he stopped himself and commented on how well most people in the religion stuck to this regular eating and working ritual.
Dream #3
Either I, I and some other man, or some man, was watching a news feed, either on TV or on a computer. An aircraft that was supposed to be an X-15 rocket, but which really looked like a black-and-yellow painted space shuttle, was getting ready to land.
The vehicle descended slowly through the blue sky. It landed on a faded tarmac strip. The landing seemed to go well. But the X-15 was damaged somehow, and everybody knew it was in danger.
The X-15 began skidding off to the left. It coasted off the tarmac, onto some grass, and finally stopped beside a chain-link fence. My view of all this was now from within the scene, as if I were floating above it in a helicopter.
Everybody was now thinking that the X-15 had been internally damaged and that it was going to explode. A crew of workers had come up to the X-15 to pull the crew members out of the vehicle before it exploded.
The X-15 now looked like a big Hummer or a big pick-up truck. The crew members were all crammed together in the front and back seats. They all looked like tourists in their fifties, kind of overweight, wearing nice jeans and shirts. They looked like they were all having a good, easygoing time, even though they were being pulled out of explosive wreckage.
Most of the flight crew and rescue crew had gotten away from the X-15. But now a different group of people came up to the vehicle. It was a group of old women, maybe in their sixties. They all thought this wreckage was a wonderful tourist attraction, and that they might sit around in it. By this time, the X-15 really just looked like a big, yellow, pick-up truck with no roof.
I saw the back end of the vehicle burst out with a jet of steam. I knew that the rest of the vehicle would probably now explode in a fireball. I may have seen one small, fiery explosion. But the old ladies didn't even seem to feel it. They were doing things like taking pictures of themselves on their phones.
Dream #4
Some guy was telling me how he thought some musical was only okay. I may have felt bad about this, because I may have been the one to introduce him to the movie of the musical.
The man said the musical all began well enough, but that by the end of the musical, everything about it seemed so shockingly racist. Plus, the actual quality of the drama and the songs just got cheaper and cheaper.
The man may have said that the turning point in the musical for him was the song "When You're a Jet." I then realized that the man was probably talking about the musical West Side Story. It surprised me that I'd introduced this musical to somebody, since I'd never been a really big fan of it.
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
dad in surgery; nephew reading menu; singing and dogs barking; acquaintance's voicemail
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I was sitting on a bed in a hospital room. My dad was laying on the bed. I had my phone on the bed and the headphones in my ears.
I was talking to my dad. But at the same time, I was walking backwards away from him. The hospital room was large. It took me a long time to move backwards all the way to the door.
I stood right on the threshold of the door. I now saw a stereotypical "sexy nurse" standing in the room with my dad. It suddenly occurred to me that my dad was going in for surgery. I had a feeling it was a pretty critical surgery.
My dad had been given some sort of tranquilizer pill. It was already making him groggy, making him talk weird. My dad saw me leaving the room and kept saying, "Goodbye, Charlie," as if I were some guy named Charlie he'd known from his past. I took this to mean that not only was my dad groggy from the medicine he was taking, but that the disease he was in the hospital for was badly affecting his mind.
I probably thought that it was possible that my dad could die very soon. I also probably started feeling bad for not having spent enough time with him, and not having let him know that I cared about him.
Dream #2
I was in my family's kitchen. It was daytime, and greyish-white light shone in through the windows. My third oldest nephew stood at the edge of the kitchen counter, reading a big, white, paper card. My nephew held up the menu at a slant by leaning it up against my mom's laptop computer, which stood open on the kitchen counter.
I looked at the card. Apparently it was a menu. The menu was probbably at least partly written out. But everything in the menu was so divided that it looked like a depiction of a TV dinner. And there did seem even to be drawings of TV-dinner-like food.
My nephew took the menu and walked away from me, up the kitchen, and toward my mom, who was standing by the sink.
Dream #3
I had walked into a backyard. It was night, but there seemed to be yard lights on everywhere. The sky was the only thing that seemed really dark.
I was sat down on the lawn. The grass was tall, thick, and green -- maybe even a little dewy. I may have had my headphones in my ears. I was singing a song.
A dog in an adjacent backyard started barking at me, as if my singing had annoyed it, or as if my singing had alerted it to my presence, and it had just decided to bark to intimidate or annoy me.
The dog did surprise me, and I did stop singing. I looked up to see where the dog was. It was in the yard at the corner of this yard.
I suddenly got mad that that the dog had barked at me. I wasn't going to take it. I started singing again, but the dog started barking again. So now I stood up and yelled at the dog in the loudest voice I could, "Stop your bullshit! I'm sick of it! I'm not going to take it anymore!"
I could see that in the yard directly back of this yard, behind a tall fence, there was another dog, behind a tall fence. This dog had been running up to the fence to bark at me, too. But I now went crazy, yelling at both of the dogs. I had the idea that I was going to jump back into the yards and fight the dogs.
The dogs seemed to have stopped barking. But I had pretty much gotten distracted from singing. There was a tall, wooden-slatted fence inside the yard I was in. It seemed to enclose some special-purpose area just behind the house. For some reason, I flew up and landed on the top of that fence. I stood balancing on the fence, keeping a lookout for something.
My sister walked into the backyard. She looked a bit younger, like she was in her late teens. She was kind of skinny. She wore a long, baggy, green hooded sweatshirt. She had long, blondish hair and was wearing black mascara.
My sister said hi to me. She may have asked me how I was doing. She may have been really concerned about me for some reason. I may have tried to ease her mind by saying something not relating to what I'd just been through. But I said, "Yeah, I'm just standing up here to keep an eye out for strange people. This one strange guy has been following me home on the bus lately, I think."
Dream #4
I was sitting on a couch in a living room, probably with my mom. It was probably night. The living room was lit with slightly dim, incandescent light. I couldn't see much of the living room. Most of my view was taken up by a mountain of clutter that stood on a coffee table in front of the couch.
I knelt down on the floor and grabbed my cell phone off the coffee table. I probably put the right headphone in my ear. I'd decided to call a female acquaintance of mine, a really good friend of my old friend R. I had this woman's number in my phone.
The woman's voicemail picked up. There were some strange sounds at first, as if the phone had actually been picked up by some living person, but the person had just not realized they'd picked up the phone. I heard a number of women talking. Then, finally, one of the women came to the phone and started leaving a voicemail greeting.
The woman said this phone was the phone for the house of herself and two other women, who would take any messages anybody left for them.
But my acquaintance was the fourth woman in the house. The woman on the voicemail greeting said that my acquaintance was not taking any messages, especially from me. The voicemail woman said that I'd either done something really crazy to my acquaintance or that I'd acted so interested in the woman that she now feared I was stalking her. So she was not going to take any messages from me.
I think I hung up the phone, upset that I couldn't leave a message. But I picked up the phone again and either dialed the same number or a different number that also belonged to my acquaintance. I knew there had to be a way for me to get in touch with this woman.
I now got a different voicemail. This time, my acquaintance was speaking. But it was almost like she was leaving a voicemail greeting just for me -- like the voicemail greeting was a message she'd left on my personal voicemail.
My acquaintance sounded really panicked. She said that she needed my help really bad. My friend R had her in a compromising position, and he was also putting her in physical danger.
Dream #1
I was sitting on a bed in a hospital room. My dad was laying on the bed. I had my phone on the bed and the headphones in my ears.
I was talking to my dad. But at the same time, I was walking backwards away from him. The hospital room was large. It took me a long time to move backwards all the way to the door.
I stood right on the threshold of the door. I now saw a stereotypical "sexy nurse" standing in the room with my dad. It suddenly occurred to me that my dad was going in for surgery. I had a feeling it was a pretty critical surgery.
My dad had been given some sort of tranquilizer pill. It was already making him groggy, making him talk weird. My dad saw me leaving the room and kept saying, "Goodbye, Charlie," as if I were some guy named Charlie he'd known from his past. I took this to mean that not only was my dad groggy from the medicine he was taking, but that the disease he was in the hospital for was badly affecting his mind.
I probably thought that it was possible that my dad could die very soon. I also probably started feeling bad for not having spent enough time with him, and not having let him know that I cared about him.
Dream #2
I was in my family's kitchen. It was daytime, and greyish-white light shone in through the windows. My third oldest nephew stood at the edge of the kitchen counter, reading a big, white, paper card. My nephew held up the menu at a slant by leaning it up against my mom's laptop computer, which stood open on the kitchen counter.
I looked at the card. Apparently it was a menu. The menu was probbably at least partly written out. But everything in the menu was so divided that it looked like a depiction of a TV dinner. And there did seem even to be drawings of TV-dinner-like food.
My nephew took the menu and walked away from me, up the kitchen, and toward my mom, who was standing by the sink.
Dream #3
I had walked into a backyard. It was night, but there seemed to be yard lights on everywhere. The sky was the only thing that seemed really dark.
I was sat down on the lawn. The grass was tall, thick, and green -- maybe even a little dewy. I may have had my headphones in my ears. I was singing a song.
A dog in an adjacent backyard started barking at me, as if my singing had annoyed it, or as if my singing had alerted it to my presence, and it had just decided to bark to intimidate or annoy me.
The dog did surprise me, and I did stop singing. I looked up to see where the dog was. It was in the yard at the corner of this yard.
I suddenly got mad that that the dog had barked at me. I wasn't going to take it. I started singing again, but the dog started barking again. So now I stood up and yelled at the dog in the loudest voice I could, "Stop your bullshit! I'm sick of it! I'm not going to take it anymore!"
I could see that in the yard directly back of this yard, behind a tall fence, there was another dog, behind a tall fence. This dog had been running up to the fence to bark at me, too. But I now went crazy, yelling at both of the dogs. I had the idea that I was going to jump back into the yards and fight the dogs.
The dogs seemed to have stopped barking. But I had pretty much gotten distracted from singing. There was a tall, wooden-slatted fence inside the yard I was in. It seemed to enclose some special-purpose area just behind the house. For some reason, I flew up and landed on the top of that fence. I stood balancing on the fence, keeping a lookout for something.
My sister walked into the backyard. She looked a bit younger, like she was in her late teens. She was kind of skinny. She wore a long, baggy, green hooded sweatshirt. She had long, blondish hair and was wearing black mascara.
My sister said hi to me. She may have asked me how I was doing. She may have been really concerned about me for some reason. I may have tried to ease her mind by saying something not relating to what I'd just been through. But I said, "Yeah, I'm just standing up here to keep an eye out for strange people. This one strange guy has been following me home on the bus lately, I think."
Dream #4
I was sitting on a couch in a living room, probably with my mom. It was probably night. The living room was lit with slightly dim, incandescent light. I couldn't see much of the living room. Most of my view was taken up by a mountain of clutter that stood on a coffee table in front of the couch.
I knelt down on the floor and grabbed my cell phone off the coffee table. I probably put the right headphone in my ear. I'd decided to call a female acquaintance of mine, a really good friend of my old friend R. I had this woman's number in my phone.
The woman's voicemail picked up. There were some strange sounds at first, as if the phone had actually been picked up by some living person, but the person had just not realized they'd picked up the phone. I heard a number of women talking. Then, finally, one of the women came to the phone and started leaving a voicemail greeting.
The woman said this phone was the phone for the house of herself and two other women, who would take any messages anybody left for them.
But my acquaintance was the fourth woman in the house. The woman on the voicemail greeting said that my acquaintance was not taking any messages, especially from me. The voicemail woman said that I'd either done something really crazy to my acquaintance or that I'd acted so interested in the woman that she now feared I was stalking her. So she was not going to take any messages from me.
I think I hung up the phone, upset that I couldn't leave a message. But I picked up the phone again and either dialed the same number or a different number that also belonged to my acquaintance. I knew there had to be a way for me to get in touch with this woman.
I now got a different voicemail. This time, my acquaintance was speaking. But it was almost like she was leaving a voicemail greeting just for me -- like the voicemail greeting was a message she'd left on my personal voicemail.
My acquaintance sounded really panicked. She said that she needed my help really bad. My friend R had her in a compromising position, and he was also putting her in physical danger.
Monday, February 27, 2012
green wal-mart; hotel breakfast; jumping through walls
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I was probably out driving through some desert, possibly with some other people, such as my mom. It was daytime. The sky hung low with heavy, grey clouds. I was afraid of a thunderstorm coming. We were headed to some particular place in the desert, so we could take care of some task.
But I suddenly remembered that there was another place in the desert -- some place in Texas, I remembered -- where Wal-Mart had built a "green" store. The Wal-Mart was "green" because it sold "green" food. This meant food that was made in a way that didn't hurt the environment. But it also meant healthy food. The "green" Wal-Mart in Texas was a test store. If it was successful, Wal-Mart would build more like it all over the country.
We weren't necessarily near this part of Texas. But I felt like if we were in the desert, we had to go check out the Wal-Mart before we took care of the rest of our task.
I was now in the parking lot of a Wal-Mart. The sky was the same. The parking felt enormous, but kind of grey, old, and dirty. The front of the Wal-Mart store also looked old. The store actually had a different name on the front, in green lettering.
I wasn't sure this was the correct Wal-Mart. So I asked a woman who was pushing a line of carts into the store. The woman was short and a tiny bit thick-framed, with copper-colored skin and long, black hair. The woman didn't really answer me. She just let me know, somehow, that she was annoyed by me.
A young man came up to us when he saw the woman was annoyed by me. He was blonde, pale-skinned, and muscly, with his hair in a square, spiky cut. He spoke roughly with me, trying to get me to go away from the woman.
But the woman told the man that I was just trying to figure out whether this was a "green" Wal-Mart. The man thought that by "green" I just meant a place that only sold vegetables. I tried to explain to him what "green" really meant.
But the young man didn't really want to listen to me. As we approached the sliding glass door entrance, the young man walked away from the woman and me, saying that if I wanted to find out if this was a green store, all I had to do was walk inside
Dream #2
I was at a hotel, getting breakfast. But I was in some kind of strange back-room, kind of area. It was almost like some sort of connection to the kitchen. But it was just a long hallway. Hallway had beige walls and beige-tiled floors, and was lit with gentle incandescent light.
A counter ran along the right wall of the hallway. Over the counter, the wall was completely lined with fixtures that looked partly like cupboards and partly like coffee dispensers -- or coffee-bean dispensers. These fixtures held all the food that the hotel kitchen would use in making its breakfasts.
I was working at the hotel (but not for the hotel) at the moment. So I was thought of as a staff member. I, therefore, took all my breakfasts directly from the hotel's stock of supplies, instead of having to wait for the kitchen to make breakfast for me.
But I was having trouble finding what I wanted for breakfast. All I could find so far was some kind of bread, possibly a bagel, and some kind of flavored cream cheese, probably strawberry-flavored.
I walked through the hallway and scanned the fixtures, looking for more food. But nothing seemed appropriate. The hallway went in something like a square loop, which I traversed clockwise.
At some point I had reversed my walk, and was traversing the loop counter-clockwise. But something like a door made me stop walking. It was like a kitchen door. I knew that beyond the door were people who were not hotel staff. I was too shy to be seen by them. Besides, I knew that they had their breakfast, and I had mine. I had to get my own breakfast without going out there to look for it.
Now the fixtures were on the left wall instead of the right wall. I walked counter-clockwise through the first part of a loop. But then the fixtures were on the right wall again, and I was walking clockwishe. I kept thinking to myself, wondering what kind of food would be appropriate for breakfast, other than a piece of a bagel and some strawberry cream cheese. But nothing really came to mind.
At some point I was facing a wall of fixtures. I turned away from it to find myself in a place like a Whole Foods. But it was empty of people, and, it seemed, largely empty of food and furniture. But it seemed a lot more likely that I would find something I wanted for breakfast here.
I walked through an open space, where usually all the service islands for the Whole Foods salad bar would be. I walked past a few empty glass display cases, which probably would once have held meats.
I then came to a small area like a soup shop. There were a few people here. One of the people was JS, the head of my department at one of my old jobs. She and one other woman were customers. There were a couple of workers as well.
There was some sign up on the wall saying what was being served today. All I was really looking for was breakfast. But the main service area was just a set of big, black pots filled with soup and something that looked like meat and sesame noodles.
I didn't want any of this. But I also didn't want to look like somebody who was so tasteless that he wouldn't want any of this food. I figured the other customers would think I was vulgar. So I snuck away from the area, hoping nobody would notice me.
I was back in the huge, empty space. I was walking past the empty glass cases again. Now I saw a lot more breads and cream cheeses. I wondered if it was okay for someone to eat that much bread and cream cheese, or only to have bread and cream cheese for breakfast. But I saw a pineapple-flavored cream cheese. I thought that if cream cheeses were flavored, then it wasn't such a bad thing for someone only to have bread and cream cheese for breakfast.
At this point, I may have started to see other foods behind the glass case. But I don't think I figured out what they were, or what they could end up being.
Dream #3
I was with a few other people in some area like a cafeteria in a hospital building. But there were only three or four tables in this area. The tables were all tall, and they stood in a line, from the left wall to the right wall. The right wall was green. The left wall was partly a green wall and partly a window-wall, with the inside coated with some reflective, silvery material.
I and at least one child had to jump from one table top to the next. This was supposed to be a test of our athletic ability. A man was monitoring our progress. One boy was currently jumping across the tables. I stood on the floor, watching the boy. The man stood on the floor, on the opposite side of the tables from me, walking along with the boy and guiding him.
The boy had been jumping from the left to the right. But when the boy reached the right wall, the man told him he had to jump all the way back to the far left table. The boy jumped. He floated through the air kind of dizzily, almost as if he were flying. It seemed like he made it all the way across the room. But I'm pretty sure he landed right back at the right table.
The boy then tried the jump again. By accident, the boy jumped through the right wall. He reappeared through the left wall and landed on the left table. He jumped on all the tables and ended up back at the right table. This was the end of his test.
The man said, "Now you see the secret of this. It's jumping through the wall. You come back around. Like in the Pac-Man game. It wastes much less energy than jumping all the way across the room. But you did it by accident this time. And you can do it on purpose."
I was now standing on the far left table. Apparently I was supposed to show the boy that it was completely possible to jump through the walls on purpose. But I was unsure of myself. I was certain I couldn't even have done the across-the-room "jump" the boy had first done. I couldn't jump very far at all. And the tables were -- now, anyway -- pretty far away from the walls to begin with. Would I even hit the wall?
But it was my task at least to try to jump to and through the wall. So I turned toward the left wall. As I did I saw, in a corner of the room off to my left, JS. She seemed to be monitoring my progress as well.
I knew I couldn't disappoint JS. So I jumped off the table. The wall was at least five meters away. I was surprised that I seemed to be reaching the wall with no problem. But I wondered if I would get through it.
The wall was the silvery-coated window wall. (And, now that I think of it, I didn't see my reflection in the dim, shimmery material.) I cringed as I approached the wall. But I got through it.
But I didn't end up on the other side of the room. Instead, I ended up outside, at night. I was in some weird kind of concrete space, a set of balconies, like the twisting portions of a parking garage. I fell down a couple of stories and finally landed in a narrow rectangle.
I wondered what my failure was. I heard the man's voice in my head. The man told me that I'd jumped through an area -- something like a transition area -- instead of jumping through a regular piece of wall. The man seemed to think this was normal, as I'd been dealing with some kind of transition space before I'd come to the jumping training.
I knew the man was right, and I could actually remember having come from the transition space before the training. But I also knew that the window-wall was a door to the transition space. If I'd only gone through the regular portion of the wall, I would have jumped through to the other side of the room just fine.
Dream #1
I was probably out driving through some desert, possibly with some other people, such as my mom. It was daytime. The sky hung low with heavy, grey clouds. I was afraid of a thunderstorm coming. We were headed to some particular place in the desert, so we could take care of some task.
But I suddenly remembered that there was another place in the desert -- some place in Texas, I remembered -- where Wal-Mart had built a "green" store. The Wal-Mart was "green" because it sold "green" food. This meant food that was made in a way that didn't hurt the environment. But it also meant healthy food. The "green" Wal-Mart in Texas was a test store. If it was successful, Wal-Mart would build more like it all over the country.
We weren't necessarily near this part of Texas. But I felt like if we were in the desert, we had to go check out the Wal-Mart before we took care of the rest of our task.
I was now in the parking lot of a Wal-Mart. The sky was the same. The parking felt enormous, but kind of grey, old, and dirty. The front of the Wal-Mart store also looked old. The store actually had a different name on the front, in green lettering.
I wasn't sure this was the correct Wal-Mart. So I asked a woman who was pushing a line of carts into the store. The woman was short and a tiny bit thick-framed, with copper-colored skin and long, black hair. The woman didn't really answer me. She just let me know, somehow, that she was annoyed by me.
A young man came up to us when he saw the woman was annoyed by me. He was blonde, pale-skinned, and muscly, with his hair in a square, spiky cut. He spoke roughly with me, trying to get me to go away from the woman.
But the woman told the man that I was just trying to figure out whether this was a "green" Wal-Mart. The man thought that by "green" I just meant a place that only sold vegetables. I tried to explain to him what "green" really meant.
But the young man didn't really want to listen to me. As we approached the sliding glass door entrance, the young man walked away from the woman and me, saying that if I wanted to find out if this was a green store, all I had to do was walk inside
Dream #2
I was at a hotel, getting breakfast. But I was in some kind of strange back-room, kind of area. It was almost like some sort of connection to the kitchen. But it was just a long hallway. Hallway had beige walls and beige-tiled floors, and was lit with gentle incandescent light.
A counter ran along the right wall of the hallway. Over the counter, the wall was completely lined with fixtures that looked partly like cupboards and partly like coffee dispensers -- or coffee-bean dispensers. These fixtures held all the food that the hotel kitchen would use in making its breakfasts.
I was working at the hotel (but not for the hotel) at the moment. So I was thought of as a staff member. I, therefore, took all my breakfasts directly from the hotel's stock of supplies, instead of having to wait for the kitchen to make breakfast for me.
But I was having trouble finding what I wanted for breakfast. All I could find so far was some kind of bread, possibly a bagel, and some kind of flavored cream cheese, probably strawberry-flavored.
I walked through the hallway and scanned the fixtures, looking for more food. But nothing seemed appropriate. The hallway went in something like a square loop, which I traversed clockwise.
At some point I had reversed my walk, and was traversing the loop counter-clockwise. But something like a door made me stop walking. It was like a kitchen door. I knew that beyond the door were people who were not hotel staff. I was too shy to be seen by them. Besides, I knew that they had their breakfast, and I had mine. I had to get my own breakfast without going out there to look for it.
Now the fixtures were on the left wall instead of the right wall. I walked counter-clockwise through the first part of a loop. But then the fixtures were on the right wall again, and I was walking clockwishe. I kept thinking to myself, wondering what kind of food would be appropriate for breakfast, other than a piece of a bagel and some strawberry cream cheese. But nothing really came to mind.
At some point I was facing a wall of fixtures. I turned away from it to find myself in a place like a Whole Foods. But it was empty of people, and, it seemed, largely empty of food and furniture. But it seemed a lot more likely that I would find something I wanted for breakfast here.
I walked through an open space, where usually all the service islands for the Whole Foods salad bar would be. I walked past a few empty glass display cases, which probably would once have held meats.
I then came to a small area like a soup shop. There were a few people here. One of the people was JS, the head of my department at one of my old jobs. She and one other woman were customers. There were a couple of workers as well.
There was some sign up on the wall saying what was being served today. All I was really looking for was breakfast. But the main service area was just a set of big, black pots filled with soup and something that looked like meat and sesame noodles.
I didn't want any of this. But I also didn't want to look like somebody who was so tasteless that he wouldn't want any of this food. I figured the other customers would think I was vulgar. So I snuck away from the area, hoping nobody would notice me.
I was back in the huge, empty space. I was walking past the empty glass cases again. Now I saw a lot more breads and cream cheeses. I wondered if it was okay for someone to eat that much bread and cream cheese, or only to have bread and cream cheese for breakfast. But I saw a pineapple-flavored cream cheese. I thought that if cream cheeses were flavored, then it wasn't such a bad thing for someone only to have bread and cream cheese for breakfast.
At this point, I may have started to see other foods behind the glass case. But I don't think I figured out what they were, or what they could end up being.
Dream #3
I was with a few other people in some area like a cafeteria in a hospital building. But there were only three or four tables in this area. The tables were all tall, and they stood in a line, from the left wall to the right wall. The right wall was green. The left wall was partly a green wall and partly a window-wall, with the inside coated with some reflective, silvery material.
I and at least one child had to jump from one table top to the next. This was supposed to be a test of our athletic ability. A man was monitoring our progress. One boy was currently jumping across the tables. I stood on the floor, watching the boy. The man stood on the floor, on the opposite side of the tables from me, walking along with the boy and guiding him.
The boy had been jumping from the left to the right. But when the boy reached the right wall, the man told him he had to jump all the way back to the far left table. The boy jumped. He floated through the air kind of dizzily, almost as if he were flying. It seemed like he made it all the way across the room. But I'm pretty sure he landed right back at the right table.
The boy then tried the jump again. By accident, the boy jumped through the right wall. He reappeared through the left wall and landed on the left table. He jumped on all the tables and ended up back at the right table. This was the end of his test.
The man said, "Now you see the secret of this. It's jumping through the wall. You come back around. Like in the Pac-Man game. It wastes much less energy than jumping all the way across the room. But you did it by accident this time. And you can do it on purpose."
I was now standing on the far left table. Apparently I was supposed to show the boy that it was completely possible to jump through the walls on purpose. But I was unsure of myself. I was certain I couldn't even have done the across-the-room "jump" the boy had first done. I couldn't jump very far at all. And the tables were -- now, anyway -- pretty far away from the walls to begin with. Would I even hit the wall?
But it was my task at least to try to jump to and through the wall. So I turned toward the left wall. As I did I saw, in a corner of the room off to my left, JS. She seemed to be monitoring my progress as well.
I knew I couldn't disappoint JS. So I jumped off the table. The wall was at least five meters away. I was surprised that I seemed to be reaching the wall with no problem. But I wondered if I would get through it.
The wall was the silvery-coated window wall. (And, now that I think of it, I didn't see my reflection in the dim, shimmery material.) I cringed as I approached the wall. But I got through it.
But I didn't end up on the other side of the room. Instead, I ended up outside, at night. I was in some weird kind of concrete space, a set of balconies, like the twisting portions of a parking garage. I fell down a couple of stories and finally landed in a narrow rectangle.
I wondered what my failure was. I heard the man's voice in my head. The man told me that I'd jumped through an area -- something like a transition area -- instead of jumping through a regular piece of wall. The man seemed to think this was normal, as I'd been dealing with some kind of transition space before I'd come to the jumping training.
I knew the man was right, and I could actually remember having come from the transition space before the training. But I also knew that the window-wall was a door to the transition space. If I'd only gone through the regular portion of the wall, I would have jumped through to the other side of the room just fine.
Sunday, February 26, 2012
driving to texas; movie-concert work farewell; hotel policeman
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I had just been part of some situation where somebody had been trying to tell someone else how far away one point in Texas was from another point. The person telling this had been lazy and wrong. I thought to myself that all he'd had to do was show a couple of points on a map and figure out things that way.
I was now figuring out the distances between the towns myself. One town was in south central Texas. The other town was on the east border of south Texas. I was looking at these two towns from a map. But the map took up my entire field of view. It felt like I was flying over the map, looking down on some actual landscape, even though it looked just like a map.
I kept flying over the border of Texas, spotting three towns that lay right on the border. One was San Martin. I forgot the name of the second one, which was farther south. The one farthest south was named Moon.
I was now with somebody else, a young man, tall, roundly muscular, with a mostly-shaved head. We were apparently driving to the town on the border of Texas. I knew that the town was 683 miles away.
We spoke about driving. As we did I saw our destination, or one of our destinations, in the distance. It was a small down at the distant end of a straight highway. The sky behind the town was purple and dim from sunset. There also seemed to be some kind of stone bluff that was taller than any building in the town. Or else this stone bluff may actually have been the hotel building where we were staying.
We were now in the hotel. It must have been night. We didn't have many lights on in the bedroom of the hotel. Only light from the bathroom shone into the bedroom. We were probably getting ready for bed or getting up and getting ready for the day.
But now a man from the hotel came in. He was tall, thin, with longish, blonde-brown hair and a receding hairline. He wore a white shirt and a red vest. The man told us that he needed us to move out of this room into another room. There were some kind of important people, the man explained, who needed the room we were in.
He told us that people had either moved out of or been kicked out of the other room. Everybody else in the hotel thought, because of the people who'd been in that room, that the room was really bad. But, the hotel man said, the room was really the best room in the hotel. The man was keeping this secret for us, if we would be so kind as to move.
The man I was with didn't have a problem with moving. But I did. Apparently I had to go somewhere for work. I was actually getting ready to go there right now. I had to be to a meeting at 10 AM. And that was right in the middle of the time when I needed to be to the meeting.
I was slinging on a suit jacket as I thought to myself that, after all, the man I was with could move all our stuff into the other hotel room. Or the hotel people could do it. But I didn't trust things either way. As long as I couldn't be here to see things getting moved, I couldn't trust that something wouldn't get lost. I really didn't want to move, even if we did get a better room.
Dream #2
I was at a movie theatre. It was gigantic. It was all dark, with almost a feeling that we were outside on a dark night -- possibly just because the place was so huge. The seats of the theatre were all set, in huge sections, at different angles. My section was set so that my left side faced the movie screen.
I had probably just finished watching one movie. Now another movie was set to begin. I didn't have a ticket to watch this movie. But I figured that if I just stayed in my seat, I could watch the second movie without getting caught.
Now it was like the second movie was a movie I had been here to see all along. I was really excited for it. But as I sat waiting, two women came into my row of seats and sat down to my left. The two women were maybe in their thirties, kind of attractive, but a little worn out looking, and a little boisterous and crude.
The women may have been talking about the show. Apparently the show was either a concert or a movie about a concert. The band "in concert" was some new rock band that the women were in love with. The band had a punky but smart sensibility. I didn't like that type of music. But I think I convinced myself I liked them. Otherwise, I reasoned, I wouldn't be here.
The woman closest to me tossed a bunch of boxes into the seat between her and me. The boxes were bulky and blocked my view of the screen. But the woman didn't seem satisfied with that. She began pushing the boxes -- and something on top of the boxes -- at me, crowding me out of my own chair.
I moved away. I sat on my seat's armrest. I think I even moved over to the next seat to my right. But by that time, I may have been to the aisle. I couldn't go any farther.
I figured this was enough. I was tired of being crowded out by the women. I was going to leave. I was now walking away. I was outside, on a long, straight road through a small town in the desert. It was daytime. There were a lot of cars out on the road. Now I was regretting not having stayed for the show. I remembered that maybe, after all, the band was good.
I could now hear the beginning of the movie, as if I were still close enough to the theatre to hear the movie. The band had just come out on stage. They said they were going to do a cover version of the Beatles song "Love Me Do."
The person who had introduced the band onto the stage said something like, "Oh, that's actually one of the hardest Beatles songs to cover. Good luck, guys."
But I remembered that the band had done the cover pretty well. I could now hear the song in my head. It sounded like "Love Me Do," but with the soft-punky sound of the band. I thought it was okay.
I was walking for just a moment through the neighborhood I'd lived in when I was in high school. I may have been looking at my phone. My sister was asking me a lot of personal information. I didn't want to give it to her. I felt like she would use it in bad ways.
I had then come into an office building. I was in a big hallway that seemed to curve around some large auditorium. The hallway was white with grey carpeting and fluorescent light. It felt like a hallway inside a new church building to me.
At some point a man told me that I'd better get ready, because everybody was going to be moving out of this building pretty soon. Possibly a tall, slim, black woman told me the same thing. The woman was like some kind of important secretary. The man, whom I saw somewhere, was an IT person. He was tallish, fattish, and bald, with red-brown hair on the sides of his head and a red-brown mustache.
I curved around into some slanted area like a coat closet that actually connected the hallway I was in to another hallway. I turned right down that other hallway, walked down, and found myself in some kind of lobby area with a group of office workers.
I had been thinking about what the IT man had said. A lot of these guys were IT guys. They spoke to me about where the IT operations for the company were going to move. Most of it, they said, would be in a building different from the building I was going to. They mentioned some cities.
I asked about a couple IT people, as if I were trying to confirm that they'd done something for me in the past. But the others said I had the wrong people. They told me the name of the man who had actually helped me. They then told me either that that the man was no longer with the company or that he was going to be moving really far away.
Dream #3
I had come from somewhere else and had now arrived in a hotel room, which was also set up as an office. The "office" side of the room was just a wall-length desk with two computers on it. The room was mostly dark, with just the glow of the computer screens and the incandescent light from some other room lighting the place.
I was probably working here with a pretty, black woman. But right while we were in the middle of some project, "my boss" came in. He was an old man, kind of gruff looking, with blonde hair and a mustache.
The man began giving us some speech which implied that he suspected me of something. He thought I was a bad person who was waiting for just the right moment to do something bad. I think he was just waiting for a reason to get rid of me.
The man now began giving us some kind of justification for his feelings. He said he'd worked for years as a SWAT team member or some kind of special operations guy. He got to know the signs of a bad person.
The man then began telling us stories of how he'd have to talk down people who'd finally gone bad. The man said that he'd really been aiming to shoot the people dead all along. But you had to go through a whole protocol before you could finally kill the guy.
The man stood before us, re-enacting a scene. It now seemed like the man was wearing heavy SWAT team gear. He seemed to be a bit younger, but also a lot more wrinkled and worn out. His hair was a whole lot thinner, but a lot longer. And his eyes were frantic and bugged-out. He may have been holding a rifle.
The man told us how he'd balance legal phrases intended to calm down the target with a manner of speech calculated to frighten the target and make him jumpy. The man said, "I'd keep telling the creep, 'Put down your gun! You're alright! Put down your gun!' But, really, I was just egging him on. I wanted him to lift his gun, so I could blow his head off!"
The man seemed so frantic by this point in time that I could hardly bear looking at him. But now there was the sound of sirens. I turned around and looked toward the curtained window of the hotel room. I could see full, grey daylight coming in dimly below the bottom fringe of the curtain. I was waiting to see the flashing lights accompanying the sirens.
The man or the woman may have said that the cops were finally here, that the man had been planning all along to have me arrested, and that I'd now finally given him a reason to have me arrested.
Dream #1
I had just been part of some situation where somebody had been trying to tell someone else how far away one point in Texas was from another point. The person telling this had been lazy and wrong. I thought to myself that all he'd had to do was show a couple of points on a map and figure out things that way.
I was now figuring out the distances between the towns myself. One town was in south central Texas. The other town was on the east border of south Texas. I was looking at these two towns from a map. But the map took up my entire field of view. It felt like I was flying over the map, looking down on some actual landscape, even though it looked just like a map.
I kept flying over the border of Texas, spotting three towns that lay right on the border. One was San Martin. I forgot the name of the second one, which was farther south. The one farthest south was named Moon.
I was now with somebody else, a young man, tall, roundly muscular, with a mostly-shaved head. We were apparently driving to the town on the border of Texas. I knew that the town was 683 miles away.
We spoke about driving. As we did I saw our destination, or one of our destinations, in the distance. It was a small down at the distant end of a straight highway. The sky behind the town was purple and dim from sunset. There also seemed to be some kind of stone bluff that was taller than any building in the town. Or else this stone bluff may actually have been the hotel building where we were staying.
We were now in the hotel. It must have been night. We didn't have many lights on in the bedroom of the hotel. Only light from the bathroom shone into the bedroom. We were probably getting ready for bed or getting up and getting ready for the day.
But now a man from the hotel came in. He was tall, thin, with longish, blonde-brown hair and a receding hairline. He wore a white shirt and a red vest. The man told us that he needed us to move out of this room into another room. There were some kind of important people, the man explained, who needed the room we were in.
He told us that people had either moved out of or been kicked out of the other room. Everybody else in the hotel thought, because of the people who'd been in that room, that the room was really bad. But, the hotel man said, the room was really the best room in the hotel. The man was keeping this secret for us, if we would be so kind as to move.
The man I was with didn't have a problem with moving. But I did. Apparently I had to go somewhere for work. I was actually getting ready to go there right now. I had to be to a meeting at 10 AM. And that was right in the middle of the time when I needed to be to the meeting.
I was slinging on a suit jacket as I thought to myself that, after all, the man I was with could move all our stuff into the other hotel room. Or the hotel people could do it. But I didn't trust things either way. As long as I couldn't be here to see things getting moved, I couldn't trust that something wouldn't get lost. I really didn't want to move, even if we did get a better room.
Dream #2
I was at a movie theatre. It was gigantic. It was all dark, with almost a feeling that we were outside on a dark night -- possibly just because the place was so huge. The seats of the theatre were all set, in huge sections, at different angles. My section was set so that my left side faced the movie screen.
I had probably just finished watching one movie. Now another movie was set to begin. I didn't have a ticket to watch this movie. But I figured that if I just stayed in my seat, I could watch the second movie without getting caught.
Now it was like the second movie was a movie I had been here to see all along. I was really excited for it. But as I sat waiting, two women came into my row of seats and sat down to my left. The two women were maybe in their thirties, kind of attractive, but a little worn out looking, and a little boisterous and crude.
The women may have been talking about the show. Apparently the show was either a concert or a movie about a concert. The band "in concert" was some new rock band that the women were in love with. The band had a punky but smart sensibility. I didn't like that type of music. But I think I convinced myself I liked them. Otherwise, I reasoned, I wouldn't be here.
The woman closest to me tossed a bunch of boxes into the seat between her and me. The boxes were bulky and blocked my view of the screen. But the woman didn't seem satisfied with that. She began pushing the boxes -- and something on top of the boxes -- at me, crowding me out of my own chair.
I moved away. I sat on my seat's armrest. I think I even moved over to the next seat to my right. But by that time, I may have been to the aisle. I couldn't go any farther.
I figured this was enough. I was tired of being crowded out by the women. I was going to leave. I was now walking away. I was outside, on a long, straight road through a small town in the desert. It was daytime. There were a lot of cars out on the road. Now I was regretting not having stayed for the show. I remembered that maybe, after all, the band was good.
I could now hear the beginning of the movie, as if I were still close enough to the theatre to hear the movie. The band had just come out on stage. They said they were going to do a cover version of the Beatles song "Love Me Do."
The person who had introduced the band onto the stage said something like, "Oh, that's actually one of the hardest Beatles songs to cover. Good luck, guys."
But I remembered that the band had done the cover pretty well. I could now hear the song in my head. It sounded like "Love Me Do," but with the soft-punky sound of the band. I thought it was okay.
I was walking for just a moment through the neighborhood I'd lived in when I was in high school. I may have been looking at my phone. My sister was asking me a lot of personal information. I didn't want to give it to her. I felt like she would use it in bad ways.
I had then come into an office building. I was in a big hallway that seemed to curve around some large auditorium. The hallway was white with grey carpeting and fluorescent light. It felt like a hallway inside a new church building to me.
At some point a man told me that I'd better get ready, because everybody was going to be moving out of this building pretty soon. Possibly a tall, slim, black woman told me the same thing. The woman was like some kind of important secretary. The man, whom I saw somewhere, was an IT person. He was tallish, fattish, and bald, with red-brown hair on the sides of his head and a red-brown mustache.
I curved around into some slanted area like a coat closet that actually connected the hallway I was in to another hallway. I turned right down that other hallway, walked down, and found myself in some kind of lobby area with a group of office workers.
I had been thinking about what the IT man had said. A lot of these guys were IT guys. They spoke to me about where the IT operations for the company were going to move. Most of it, they said, would be in a building different from the building I was going to. They mentioned some cities.
I asked about a couple IT people, as if I were trying to confirm that they'd done something for me in the past. But the others said I had the wrong people. They told me the name of the man who had actually helped me. They then told me either that that the man was no longer with the company or that he was going to be moving really far away.
Dream #3
I had come from somewhere else and had now arrived in a hotel room, which was also set up as an office. The "office" side of the room was just a wall-length desk with two computers on it. The room was mostly dark, with just the glow of the computer screens and the incandescent light from some other room lighting the place.
I was probably working here with a pretty, black woman. But right while we were in the middle of some project, "my boss" came in. He was an old man, kind of gruff looking, with blonde hair and a mustache.
The man began giving us some speech which implied that he suspected me of something. He thought I was a bad person who was waiting for just the right moment to do something bad. I think he was just waiting for a reason to get rid of me.
The man now began giving us some kind of justification for his feelings. He said he'd worked for years as a SWAT team member or some kind of special operations guy. He got to know the signs of a bad person.
The man then began telling us stories of how he'd have to talk down people who'd finally gone bad. The man said that he'd really been aiming to shoot the people dead all along. But you had to go through a whole protocol before you could finally kill the guy.
The man stood before us, re-enacting a scene. It now seemed like the man was wearing heavy SWAT team gear. He seemed to be a bit younger, but also a lot more wrinkled and worn out. His hair was a whole lot thinner, but a lot longer. And his eyes were frantic and bugged-out. He may have been holding a rifle.
The man told us how he'd balance legal phrases intended to calm down the target with a manner of speech calculated to frighten the target and make him jumpy. The man said, "I'd keep telling the creep, 'Put down your gun! You're alright! Put down your gun!' But, really, I was just egging him on. I wanted him to lift his gun, so I could blow his head off!"
The man seemed so frantic by this point in time that I could hardly bear looking at him. But now there was the sound of sirens. I turned around and looked toward the curtained window of the hotel room. I could see full, grey daylight coming in dimly below the bottom fringe of the curtain. I was waiting to see the flashing lights accompanying the sirens.
The man or the woman may have said that the cops were finally here, that the man had been planning all along to have me arrested, and that I'd now finally given him a reason to have me arrested.
Saturday, February 25, 2012
arcade; kitchen stowaways; okay paperwork
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I was in an arcade, possibly with a few kids. Other than those kids, the arcade was empty of people. The arcade was divided into a few "rooms." The place was lit kind of brightly, for an arcade, with incandescent lights.
At some point I was sitting at a video game booth, like I was playing a driving game. At another point, I was playing some other video game. I had my face close up to the screen. And, later on, I was pumping coins frantically into the game.
Dream #2
There were three people, of whom I may have been one, though I saw all three people from a third person view. The other two were a young man and a young woman.
The three stood among a crowd of people who were seated at an outdoor restaurant. It was night, and the moonlight shone on everybody at the restaurant. It felt like the restaurant was huge, extending far back under some shelter in the distance.
A blonde business woman came up to the three, but focused on the two young people. She may have handed the two some kind of business form, then told the two that she was no longer going to allow them to stay here. Apparently the two people had been living in this restaurant. They had even, while the restaurant was open, been making meals for customers, like some kind of renegade chefs.
The business woman walked away. The two now knew that they were "evicted" from this place. They could no longer live here and make food here.
The third person (me?) wished he could have stood up for the other two while the business woman had been handing them the papers. But he couldn't have done anything, apparently. But now there was another woman, a kind of short, girlish-looking, blonde woman. She was the business woman's assistant.
The assistant was holding something that looked like a red, plastic Folger's coffee jar filled with some kind of white sauce, like ranch dressing or secret sauce. The assistant said, "My boss owns all kinds of restaurants. She can't oversee them all. So some of them do terribly. There are a few that are closed down."
The assistant may have handed the jar of sauce to the young man and woman. I understood this to mean that the assistant had given the young man and woman the ability to get into and live in the abandoned kitchens owned by the business woman.
Time had passed. I (or the third person?) had gone out to look for an abandoned restaurant. I'd found one. Now I had to pick up the young man and woman in secret, so the business woman wouldn't know we were going.
The young man and woman were sitting out at a table at an outdoor restaurant that was closed for the night and empty. The moon may have been large in the sky, shining down on the young man and woman. I ran down the aisle of tables, then grabbed the young woman's hand and began running with her. The young man began running as well. As I'd grabbed three woman's hand, I'd knocked some silverware off the table.
Dream #3
I was in an office, showing my boss a stack of paperwork I'd done. My boss told me something along the lines that I was doing a good job, but that I should probably slow it down. He may also have referred to some guy in my paperwork, telling me that I had made a mistake in his files. If I'd slowed down, I wouldn't have made the mistake.
I now led my boss into another office, which was apparently my office. I showed my boss another stack of paperwork, a lot of which had to do with the guy. Somehow my boss had come to understand that I hadn't made the mistakes he'd thought I'd made, and that I wasn't working too fast. My boss said that he'd leave me alone with my work, then.
At another time I saw a stack of paperwork on a step in a tall, steep staircase. This staircase may have led to something like a tall, steep, but old and run-down auditorium, almost as huge as a stadium, on a seat in which sat another stack of paperwork.
Dream #1
I was in an arcade, possibly with a few kids. Other than those kids, the arcade was empty of people. The arcade was divided into a few "rooms." The place was lit kind of brightly, for an arcade, with incandescent lights.
At some point I was sitting at a video game booth, like I was playing a driving game. At another point, I was playing some other video game. I had my face close up to the screen. And, later on, I was pumping coins frantically into the game.
Dream #2
There were three people, of whom I may have been one, though I saw all three people from a third person view. The other two were a young man and a young woman.
The three stood among a crowd of people who were seated at an outdoor restaurant. It was night, and the moonlight shone on everybody at the restaurant. It felt like the restaurant was huge, extending far back under some shelter in the distance.
A blonde business woman came up to the three, but focused on the two young people. She may have handed the two some kind of business form, then told the two that she was no longer going to allow them to stay here. Apparently the two people had been living in this restaurant. They had even, while the restaurant was open, been making meals for customers, like some kind of renegade chefs.
The business woman walked away. The two now knew that they were "evicted" from this place. They could no longer live here and make food here.
The third person (me?) wished he could have stood up for the other two while the business woman had been handing them the papers. But he couldn't have done anything, apparently. But now there was another woman, a kind of short, girlish-looking, blonde woman. She was the business woman's assistant.
The assistant was holding something that looked like a red, plastic Folger's coffee jar filled with some kind of white sauce, like ranch dressing or secret sauce. The assistant said, "My boss owns all kinds of restaurants. She can't oversee them all. So some of them do terribly. There are a few that are closed down."
The assistant may have handed the jar of sauce to the young man and woman. I understood this to mean that the assistant had given the young man and woman the ability to get into and live in the abandoned kitchens owned by the business woman.
Time had passed. I (or the third person?) had gone out to look for an abandoned restaurant. I'd found one. Now I had to pick up the young man and woman in secret, so the business woman wouldn't know we were going.
The young man and woman were sitting out at a table at an outdoor restaurant that was closed for the night and empty. The moon may have been large in the sky, shining down on the young man and woman. I ran down the aisle of tables, then grabbed the young woman's hand and began running with her. The young man began running as well. As I'd grabbed three woman's hand, I'd knocked some silverware off the table.
Dream #3
I was in an office, showing my boss a stack of paperwork I'd done. My boss told me something along the lines that I was doing a good job, but that I should probably slow it down. He may also have referred to some guy in my paperwork, telling me that I had made a mistake in his files. If I'd slowed down, I wouldn't have made the mistake.
I now led my boss into another office, which was apparently my office. I showed my boss another stack of paperwork, a lot of which had to do with the guy. Somehow my boss had come to understand that I hadn't made the mistakes he'd thought I'd made, and that I wasn't working too fast. My boss said that he'd leave me alone with my work, then.
At another time I saw a stack of paperwork on a step in a tall, steep staircase. This staircase may have led to something like a tall, steep, but old and run-down auditorium, almost as huge as a stadium, on a seat in which sat another stack of paperwork.
Friday, February 24, 2012
close to home; john quincy adams
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
It was night. I was driving through some suburban area by myself. I was probably driving to my family's house. I may have been living at my family's house at the time.
As I slowed down to park at the curb in front of my family's house, I passed a few houses. All the houses had almost all their lights off. Only a few lonely glimmers shone from the houses.
I knew that one of the houses was the house of somebody I'd spoken with over the phone as a part of my work. I knew that the man I'd spoken with had been in the military.
I remarked to myself, as I pulled my car to a stop, then backed it up a bit to get parallel with the curb, that it was strange how far away I thought the people were who I spoke with at work, but how close they really were. This was a little eerie and unsettling to me. Something about the man being in the military also unsettled me.
Dream #2
I was reading something about John Quincy Adams. But I can't remember what.
Dream #1
It was night. I was driving through some suburban area by myself. I was probably driving to my family's house. I may have been living at my family's house at the time.
As I slowed down to park at the curb in front of my family's house, I passed a few houses. All the houses had almost all their lights off. Only a few lonely glimmers shone from the houses.
I knew that one of the houses was the house of somebody I'd spoken with over the phone as a part of my work. I knew that the man I'd spoken with had been in the military.
I remarked to myself, as I pulled my car to a stop, then backed it up a bit to get parallel with the curb, that it was strange how far away I thought the people were who I spoke with at work, but how close they really were. This was a little eerie and unsettling to me. Something about the man being in the military also unsettled me.
Dream #2
I was reading something about John Quincy Adams. But I can't remember what.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
catalpa vineyard
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
It was a bright, sunny day. I stood out before a tall, grassy hill with a young girl. The hill was a lot like a hill in my hometown.
There seemed to be a vineyard growing on the hill. But all the grape vines seemed to be growing widely spaced apart, and they stood almost as tall as trees. The grape plants also seemed to be growing cone-like masses of flowers, like wisteria flowers. The whole space was surrounded by a kind of short, run-down wooden fence.
I pointed the vineyard out to the girl, pointing with my left hand. I told the girl that I felt like I should have known about this vineyard for a long time. Maybe I had known about it, but I just hadn't cared about it. Now it was in bad shape. I wondered if I couldn't fix it up some.
I then noticed a huge tree, in its own fence, either inside the vineyard or just outside it. The trunk of the tree looked really ragged, like the tree was old or in bad shape. The tree may also have been barren of leafs. But it was growing cones of flowers, like a chesnut tree or a catalpa tree.
Dream #1
It was a bright, sunny day. I stood out before a tall, grassy hill with a young girl. The hill was a lot like a hill in my hometown.
There seemed to be a vineyard growing on the hill. But all the grape vines seemed to be growing widely spaced apart, and they stood almost as tall as trees. The grape plants also seemed to be growing cone-like masses of flowers, like wisteria flowers. The whole space was surrounded by a kind of short, run-down wooden fence.
I pointed the vineyard out to the girl, pointing with my left hand. I told the girl that I felt like I should have known about this vineyard for a long time. Maybe I had known about it, but I just hadn't cared about it. Now it was in bad shape. I wondered if I couldn't fix it up some.
I then noticed a huge tree, in its own fence, either inside the vineyard or just outside it. The trunk of the tree looked really ragged, like the tree was old or in bad shape. The tree may also have been barren of leafs. But it was growing cones of flowers, like a chesnut tree or a catalpa tree.
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