Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
A documentary or TV show about a 1980s rock band that decided, in the tradition of Johnny Cash, to perform a concert at a prison. I thought the idea was a little silly: the rock band didn't have the hard edge that Johnny Cash had. Most of the band's songs were kind of artsy and mellow. I felt like a lot of the prisoners would probably hate the band.
There was a close up, from a low angle, on two or three band members. The band members all had mullet hairstyles and little mustaches and goatees. The backdrop of the stage was some screen with sea-green lighting. The song the band was playing actually wasn't bad. It had a good guitar riff, which I almost recognized. I imagined that people actually could dance to this music.
The view pulled back slowly to reveal the reactions of the people in the audience. I was surprised to see that a lot of the inmates (I could only see their heads at this point) were dancing around, really into the music.
The view focused on one tall, fat man with a short, square haircut, some thin sideburns leading down into a thin jawline beard. The man was dancing slowly, but really swaying and moving. The view pulled back even more, to reveal what seemed like a mostly empty high school gymnasium, at the front of which was the stage on which the band was playing.
As the view pulled back to show the man below his waist, I saw a woman kneeling down before the man. The woman was maybe in her late thirties or early forties. She was good-looking, she wore a nice, satiny dress, and her hair was arranged really well. But something about her seemed a little low class.
The woman was on her knees, "dancing" with the man, basically by rubbing her face against the man's crotch. I was a little shocked to see the woman doing this. I thought there had to be a rule against doing something like this at an event for general audiences. But once I got over the shock, it didn't seem like such a big deal.
The view now panned to the right. About thirty feet closer to the stage were two female inmates dressed in very fancy dresses, like wedding dresses. The women both looked young, maybe not even in their twenties. One of the women spun the other woman out, then spun her back in, embracing the woman.
The woman who'd been spun was exhilarated by the spinning. She relaxed in the first woman's arms and prepared for a kiss. I got the feeling that, before this, the woman who'd been spun had been reluctant to fall in love with the woman who'd spun her. But now she was willing to fall in love and be kissed.
Dream #2
I was somewhere with my new boss JE and one of my co-workers, SC. The place may have been like a bedroom. But it may also have been like a small shop, like the cluttered shops that sell all kinds of fancy Asian gifts, like scarves, wooden ornaments, incense sticks, and so forth. But a lot of the items seemed brighter, paler, and cheaper than the gifts in the Asian stores. And the place was really bright with natural light, which just glared into a place like it might glare in through a suburban teenager's bedroom.
JE was talking about how SC came into work at 8:45 AM and left at 8:45 PM. I knew I hadn't worked that many hours. I was kind of disappointed in myself for not having done so. I felt lazy.
Showing posts with label shame. Show all posts
Showing posts with label shame. Show all posts
Thursday, November 22, 2012
Sunday, July 8, 2012
shopping for lingerie; north of italy
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I was in either a women's clothing store or a lingerie store. The store was part of a shopping mall, and I could see the shopping mall's hallway just outside the window-front of the store. The store was grey, lit with a very drab, fluorescent light. The store may also have felt a little empty of racks of clothes. Some women were shopping in a couple different places. I may have felt like I knew the women, even though I wasn't with them.
I found a rack of lingerie that I thought I might like to wear. It was mostly cami and panty sets, made out of some soft, cotton-like fabric. I saw one set that was cream colored and another set that was lavender. There may have been other sets as well. The price of these sets was only something like $2.99. I thought I should get one. But then I thought that $2.99 would be too much money to spend.
A woman who worked at the store walked up and asked me if she could help me find anything. I didn't know what to tell her. I had the feeling the woman was kind of attracted to me. She was young, kind of pretty, with black hair and pale skin. I was afraid to tell her that I was looking for lingerie for myself to wear. I didn't want her to be disappointed in her attraction to me.
I was also starting to worry because I noticed that the people in the shopping mall hallway could easily see me. There weren't many people in the hallway. But what if one of them knew me and saw me buying lingerie? I decided to get away from the lingerie and get out of the store as quickly as possible.
Dream #2
I was with a friend, probably a female friend. We were meeting for a meal. We were in some upstairs area of a shop. But we had to head downstairs to get to the restaurant area.
As we headed down the stairs, we were talking about travelling. I mentioned something that I really liked about travelling. It may have been something about rich, cheesy foods. But that may just have been symbolic of something about the intellectual climate of, or the level of respect in, certain countries.
We walked all the way to the back of the small restaurant as I continued talking to the woman. I followed the woman almost all the way to the ladies' restroom, which was on the back wall of the restaurant. All the way, I was talking about travelling. Finally, as the woman walked into the bathroom, I said something like, "The best place for what I'm talking about is in the North of Italy."
The woman closed the bathroom door. The restroom door was green. I noticed two women sitting at a small table just to the right (my right) of the restroom door. The woman closer to the door looked like Isabella Rossellini in the movie Blue Velvet. She looked at me with anxiety. Apparently I'd said something she didn't like. I had an idea it was my mention of the North of Italy.
I was standing just to the right of some sort of small service counter, like an area where wait staff could quickly fix beverages for customers. My view was partly obstructed by an espresso machine with a pale green-painted body. Behind the espresso machine stood another woman, maybe in her mid to late thirties. She was tan and had short, brown hair in a spiky, but rounded cut combed down around her head.
The woman mentioned something to me about "Svetlana," the panicked girl who was seated by the restroom door. She said that any mention of the North of Italy would make Svetlana look like she was fraternizing with the customers. This was not allowed by the manager of this store, a woman in maybe her fifties. The woman believed Svetlana had recently been fraternizing too much with the customers, and that her work performance had fallen off as a result.
I knew this meant I should stop mentioning the North of Italy. But I thought this was stupid. I hadn't even been talking to Svetlana. So how could she get in trouble for what I'd been saying? And I wasn't going to stop talking about stuff that I'd come in here talking about, just because a manager was getting stuffy about it. So I kept on talking about the rich foods in the North of Italy.
Just behind the service area was a small stairwell up to the ground level. The stairwell was across a small hallway from the bathroom door my friend had gone into. The manager now walked down the stairwell. The manager was tan, with red hair and kind of wrinkly skin. She was short and a little stout, but more in a way that made her look tough rather than out of shape. She did seem to be tough. But she also seemed to have a friendly, natural personality.
The manager had heard me talking about rich foods from the North of Italy. She jumped into the conversation easily and naturally, telling me a few things about the foods. The manager mentioned that the restaurant was actually planning on serving foods from the North of Italy on this day.
The woman had a few samples sat atop the espresso machine. The manager and I were eating these samples. I had a piece of ham that I was dipping into some kind of white sauce that was in a tiny, crystal bowl. Just to the left of that bowl there was another tiny, crystal bowl of Parmesan cheese. The manger was also eating something: I saw her putting something small into her mouth with all the fingers of her right (?) hand.
***
UPDATE: A discussion of images found in these dreams can be found at this entry in my dreamday journal.
UPDATE 2: Added drawing for dream #1, July 9th, 2012, 3:30 PM, Mountain Standard Time.
Dream #1
I was in either a women's clothing store or a lingerie store. The store was part of a shopping mall, and I could see the shopping mall's hallway just outside the window-front of the store. The store was grey, lit with a very drab, fluorescent light. The store may also have felt a little empty of racks of clothes. Some women were shopping in a couple different places. I may have felt like I knew the women, even though I wasn't with them.
I found a rack of lingerie that I thought I might like to wear. It was mostly cami and panty sets, made out of some soft, cotton-like fabric. I saw one set that was cream colored and another set that was lavender. There may have been other sets as well. The price of these sets was only something like $2.99. I thought I should get one. But then I thought that $2.99 would be too much money to spend.
A woman who worked at the store walked up and asked me if she could help me find anything. I didn't know what to tell her. I had the feeling the woman was kind of attracted to me. She was young, kind of pretty, with black hair and pale skin. I was afraid to tell her that I was looking for lingerie for myself to wear. I didn't want her to be disappointed in her attraction to me.
I was also starting to worry because I noticed that the people in the shopping mall hallway could easily see me. There weren't many people in the hallway. But what if one of them knew me and saw me buying lingerie? I decided to get away from the lingerie and get out of the store as quickly as possible.
Dream #2
I was with a friend, probably a female friend. We were meeting for a meal. We were in some upstairs area of a shop. But we had to head downstairs to get to the restaurant area.
As we headed down the stairs, we were talking about travelling. I mentioned something that I really liked about travelling. It may have been something about rich, cheesy foods. But that may just have been symbolic of something about the intellectual climate of, or the level of respect in, certain countries.
We walked all the way to the back of the small restaurant as I continued talking to the woman. I followed the woman almost all the way to the ladies' restroom, which was on the back wall of the restaurant. All the way, I was talking about travelling. Finally, as the woman walked into the bathroom, I said something like, "The best place for what I'm talking about is in the North of Italy."
The woman closed the bathroom door. The restroom door was green. I noticed two women sitting at a small table just to the right (my right) of the restroom door. The woman closer to the door looked like Isabella Rossellini in the movie Blue Velvet. She looked at me with anxiety. Apparently I'd said something she didn't like. I had an idea it was my mention of the North of Italy.
I was standing just to the right of some sort of small service counter, like an area where wait staff could quickly fix beverages for customers. My view was partly obstructed by an espresso machine with a pale green-painted body. Behind the espresso machine stood another woman, maybe in her mid to late thirties. She was tan and had short, brown hair in a spiky, but rounded cut combed down around her head.
The woman mentioned something to me about "Svetlana," the panicked girl who was seated by the restroom door. She said that any mention of the North of Italy would make Svetlana look like she was fraternizing with the customers. This was not allowed by the manager of this store, a woman in maybe her fifties. The woman believed Svetlana had recently been fraternizing too much with the customers, and that her work performance had fallen off as a result.
I knew this meant I should stop mentioning the North of Italy. But I thought this was stupid. I hadn't even been talking to Svetlana. So how could she get in trouble for what I'd been saying? And I wasn't going to stop talking about stuff that I'd come in here talking about, just because a manager was getting stuffy about it. So I kept on talking about the rich foods in the North of Italy.
Just behind the service area was a small stairwell up to the ground level. The stairwell was across a small hallway from the bathroom door my friend had gone into. The manager now walked down the stairwell. The manager was tan, with red hair and kind of wrinkly skin. She was short and a little stout, but more in a way that made her look tough rather than out of shape. She did seem to be tough. But she also seemed to have a friendly, natural personality.
The manager had heard me talking about rich foods from the North of Italy. She jumped into the conversation easily and naturally, telling me a few things about the foods. The manager mentioned that the restaurant was actually planning on serving foods from the North of Italy on this day.
The woman had a few samples sat atop the espresso machine. The manager and I were eating these samples. I had a piece of ham that I was dipping into some kind of white sauce that was in a tiny, crystal bowl. Just to the left of that bowl there was another tiny, crystal bowl of Parmesan cheese. The manger was also eating something: I saw her putting something small into her mouth with all the fingers of her right (?) hand.
***
UPDATE: A discussion of images found in these dreams can be found at this entry in my dreamday journal.
UPDATE 2: Added drawing for dream #1, July 9th, 2012, 3:30 PM, Mountain Standard Time.
Friday, May 25, 2012
holes in socks; cents per mile
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I was with a few people, possibly some of my co-workers. We all had to take off our shoes for some reason, possibly as part of a game. But I was ashamed to take off my shoes. I knew I had holes in my socks. The holes went all the way across three or so of my toes. I didn't want my co-workers to see that.
Dream #2
I was sitting at work. I was in a big but flimsy room. The room had thin, plyboard kind of walls and kind of dim, fluorescent lighting. The desk I sat at was one one side of the room, kind of set near the wall. My desk was long, but the space I was in, being so close to the wall, was kind of narrow.
One of my more senior co-workers, JP, stood just behind me and over my left shoulder. He was joking with me, talking like he had never met me before and he didn't know anything about my job.
JP asked me, "How do you get paid? In dollars per hour?"
I said, "No. In cents per mile."
"Oh..."
"Which is kind of bad, cause, sitting at this desk..."
"You don't get paid too well, do you?"
"Not much at all." I looked past my desk, over to some kind of counter and window-like hole in the wall that seemed to lead to some place like a kitchen. I thought of that place as a snack bar.
I continued. "I keep thinking I'll wheel my chair over to the snack bar and back over here a whole lot of times each day. That should kind of get my mileage up."
Sunday, May 6, 2012
whose DVD player?
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I was in a living room with some members of my family. The living room was small, kind of dim, and kind of cluttered. I sat on the carpeted floor, probably with my back propped against the foot of the couch. My sister probably sat on the couch, near my left shoulder.
My mom's best friend CM came into the room from some small hallway off to my right. She stopped and stood near some kind of cluttered frame of red-painted, metal tubing, like a frame made of a bunch of chair-frames all welded together and crammed full of old household clutter.
CM held a red electronic device in her hands. It was apparently a portable DVD player. CM asked, "Do you know whose this is?"
I told CM that the DVD player was my sister's. In fact, my sister had been looking for the DVD player just recently. But CM said something about how where she'd found the DVD player or what disc she'd found in the DVD player had led her to believe that the DVD player wasn't actually my sister's.
My sister seemed indifferent to the fact that the DVD player had been found. But she said, "Look! If he says that that's my DVD player, then it's mine! You need to listen when he tells you things."
CM possibly didn't hand me the DVD player, but she held it close enough so that I could see it. It was colored red, like an old amusement park ride, maybe even with sparkly flecks in the red. But it looked broken. Some part of the front casing was broken off, possibly the part where the DVD was held. And the casing for the batteries (AA batteries) was gone, too.
Either my youngest or my second youngest nephew came to sit down next to me. We may both have been under blankets. My nephew made up some kind of excuse for why he needed to lay by me. He was afraid -- as he'd probably be IWL -- that I would ask him not to be so close to me. But I recognized that, and I told him he was fine laying by me.
But now I realized I had left my phone plugged in off to my right, near the metal frame-thing. I wanted to have my phone near me, just in case. But I didn't want to ask my nephew to move, now that he was comfortable with me. We were both basically laying down by now. And I didn't want to make too big a deal about missing my phone, because I didn't want someone else to grab it for me -- just in case I'd left something shameful on the front screen.
Saturday, April 14, 2012
narciso rats
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I was somewhere, possibly outside, with a group of people. We were all probably single people in our late twenties or early thirties. But we all lived with each other in the same house. Somehow it was like the people living with me were all members of my family.
We were all discussing the house. It had been discovered that the house had a rat infestation. The house was infested with what were called "Narciso Rats." A pretty, blonde business woman was explaining this to us. She may have lived with us but also may have been something like our leader, or even our landlord.
We all knew we'd been having rat problems. I knew I had, too. But I seemed to be really ashamed of it in front of everybody else, like the rat problems in my own room were something that everybody else would judge me for. I may even have tried to convince myself that I didn't have any rat problems. But I knew I did. I was really afraid, too. I had a low bed in my room. I knew the rats could easily climb up and get near me at night. They might spread disease that way.
Another man near me, kind of fat, tan skinned, with short, choppy, black hair and eyeglasses, started talking about how he'd thought, at first, that he'd outsmarted the rats. He said, "I laid little bits of food out in a half-circle at a distance from my bed. I thought that would distract them. I thought the bits of food would lead them away from me." But this had probably eventually stopped working for the man.
The blonde woman told us all that the building had tried a number of ways for getting rid of the Narciso rats. But they were really hard to get rid of. Now we were all going to have to leave the building for a while. Some exterminators were coming in to do the whole building. This was the only thing that would work. Even this method might not have been totally sure of success. It might have been a possibility that the whole building would have to be destroyed.
I now realized that in my room I had a different kind of rat. (At this point I was half-waking out of my dream.) This was called something like a "Gold Flow Rat" or a "Gold Floor Rat." I heard some text being read, possibly as I read it out of a book, saying, "This animal has been placed on the dangerous species list."
Dream #1
I was somewhere, possibly outside, with a group of people. We were all probably single people in our late twenties or early thirties. But we all lived with each other in the same house. Somehow it was like the people living with me were all members of my family.
We were all discussing the house. It had been discovered that the house had a rat infestation. The house was infested with what were called "Narciso Rats." A pretty, blonde business woman was explaining this to us. She may have lived with us but also may have been something like our leader, or even our landlord.
We all knew we'd been having rat problems. I knew I had, too. But I seemed to be really ashamed of it in front of everybody else, like the rat problems in my own room were something that everybody else would judge me for. I may even have tried to convince myself that I didn't have any rat problems. But I knew I did. I was really afraid, too. I had a low bed in my room. I knew the rats could easily climb up and get near me at night. They might spread disease that way.
Another man near me, kind of fat, tan skinned, with short, choppy, black hair and eyeglasses, started talking about how he'd thought, at first, that he'd outsmarted the rats. He said, "I laid little bits of food out in a half-circle at a distance from my bed. I thought that would distract them. I thought the bits of food would lead them away from me." But this had probably eventually stopped working for the man.
The blonde woman told us all that the building had tried a number of ways for getting rid of the Narciso rats. But they were really hard to get rid of. Now we were all going to have to leave the building for a while. Some exterminators were coming in to do the whole building. This was the only thing that would work. Even this method might not have been totally sure of success. It might have been a possibility that the whole building would have to be destroyed.
I now realized that in my room I had a different kind of rat. (At this point I was half-waking out of my dream.) This was called something like a "Gold Flow Rat" or a "Gold Floor Rat." I heard some text being read, possibly as I read it out of a book, saying, "This animal has been placed on the dangerous species list."
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
make yourself useful; nephew handoff
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I was at some kind of big dinner. It was in some place like a school gym. The lights were all greenish fluorescent, like big floodlights hanging from the ceiling. The room was full of tables.
I sat at a round table with a few other people. The people I sat with were probably park rangers I've known. Everybody was talking, like at any old dinner. But it was also like everybody was giving some sort of presentation. The presentation mainly had to do with whether everybody had been doing their job well.
At the end, the task somehow fell on me of giving criticisms regarding all the rangers' performances. I said something like, "Spend less time focusing on showing how much you know about the things you know, and more time learning the things you don't know," or "Spend less time talking about the things that aren't important and more time talking about the things that are important."
While I gave my little criticism, I alternately stood up and sat down. While I sat down, I sat really far back in my chair. The whole time, everybody else at the table was blocked from my view, as if there were some huge candle or centerpiece or pile of clutter on the table.
The conversation apparently started up again. Again, I was asked to respond. But this time, when I responded, I saw, sitting to the right of one of the rangers, an old friend of mine, KB. She looked really healthy and young, though kind of skinny. She had short, spiky hair and a shiny, black leather jacket. She waved to me surreptitiously and smile-smirked a little. At first I didn't think it was her. But then I realized it was. As I sat down I tried to look past all the stuff on the table to see KB again. I could tell that she could see me and recognize me alright, even though I couldn't quite see her.
I was probably about to call out to KB. But something else happened. It was like there was now something else going on in the gym, like a physical contest of some kind. It probably involvled high school kids. I was somehow a part of it.
The gym floor was cleared out. The conestants sat on either side of the floor. I sat among one of the group. The contest may have been explained, or I may have known what it was about at the time. But I don't remember now. It was something like a race. There may have been something to do with thin, wooden frames and creme pies as well. There was also something to do with a test of strength. I think this got me worried. I was worried about something with my shoulder or something with my arm.
The scene of the contest shifted. It was like the contest, or at least part of the contest, was over. I had possibly embarrassed myself in some way during the contest, probably disappointing my teammates as well. It was like the gym was mostly cleared out, quiet and empty.
I sat on the floor. Two or three young men sat near me. They all started talking about how I should do this or that next time to keep from failing so bad at the game. They did it in a kind of joking way, like they thought something about my clumsiness was endearing. They probably eventually gave up and just told me to come sit by them.
But when I sat by them I was sitting with a whole group of high schoolers again. There may have been a general feeling of disappointment from everybody, as if nobody could believe I actually had to be on their team. I would really slow things down for them. Most of the people who thought this seemed to be guys. But there were a few girls who thought I was cute. They were happy to have me around.
I was sitting by myself again, a few meters in front of the team I had been sitting with. The gym looked different now. It was like there were window walls or high-up windows -- windows somewhere -- showing the black night sky outside.
I had the feeling I was supposed to be giving some kind of presentation. But there were a few girls in the front row of the team I had been sitting with. One or more of the girls started asking me questions, like advice questions about their lives or about paying bills. They asked partly because they thought I could help, but partly because they thought I was cute and they just wanted to talk to me. I was a little nervous about talking with them. I didn't want the boys to be jealous and start causing troubles for me.
I was now sitting right next to one of the girls. She was kind of skinny, with long, dark brown hair. She wore a dark, velvet mini-dress and something like a velvet rose in her hair. She started whispering her questions into my ear.
Dream #2
I was down in the basement of my family's house. My nephews were down there, too, running around and making messes out of things. Some of them ran into the laundry room. Others were messing around in the main part of the basement. I was trying to get them all to stop and just go back upstairs. But they wouldn't listen to me.
Finally they all just jumped into the bathroom. They left the door open a crack, so that I could see they were running around in there, making messes. I was getting really angry. At last, I opened the door and grabbed the first kid I could see -- my youngest nephew. I held him by his right arm and held him outward from me. He didn't struggle. It was like he was some solid, motionless object, like a coffee pot.
I walked up the stairs and into the living room. It was night. The only light in the living room came from the hallway. The living room seemed to be just as busy with kids as the basement had been. My brother-in-law was standing in front of the TV, which was shut off. I handed my nephew over to my brother-in-law.
Dream #1
I was at some kind of big dinner. It was in some place like a school gym. The lights were all greenish fluorescent, like big floodlights hanging from the ceiling. The room was full of tables.
I sat at a round table with a few other people. The people I sat with were probably park rangers I've known. Everybody was talking, like at any old dinner. But it was also like everybody was giving some sort of presentation. The presentation mainly had to do with whether everybody had been doing their job well.
At the end, the task somehow fell on me of giving criticisms regarding all the rangers' performances. I said something like, "Spend less time focusing on showing how much you know about the things you know, and more time learning the things you don't know," or "Spend less time talking about the things that aren't important and more time talking about the things that are important."
While I gave my little criticism, I alternately stood up and sat down. While I sat down, I sat really far back in my chair. The whole time, everybody else at the table was blocked from my view, as if there were some huge candle or centerpiece or pile of clutter on the table.
The conversation apparently started up again. Again, I was asked to respond. But this time, when I responded, I saw, sitting to the right of one of the rangers, an old friend of mine, KB. She looked really healthy and young, though kind of skinny. She had short, spiky hair and a shiny, black leather jacket. She waved to me surreptitiously and smile-smirked a little. At first I didn't think it was her. But then I realized it was. As I sat down I tried to look past all the stuff on the table to see KB again. I could tell that she could see me and recognize me alright, even though I couldn't quite see her.
I was probably about to call out to KB. But something else happened. It was like there was now something else going on in the gym, like a physical contest of some kind. It probably involvled high school kids. I was somehow a part of it.
The gym floor was cleared out. The conestants sat on either side of the floor. I sat among one of the group. The contest may have been explained, or I may have known what it was about at the time. But I don't remember now. It was something like a race. There may have been something to do with thin, wooden frames and creme pies as well. There was also something to do with a test of strength. I think this got me worried. I was worried about something with my shoulder or something with my arm.
The scene of the contest shifted. It was like the contest, or at least part of the contest, was over. I had possibly embarrassed myself in some way during the contest, probably disappointing my teammates as well. It was like the gym was mostly cleared out, quiet and empty.
I sat on the floor. Two or three young men sat near me. They all started talking about how I should do this or that next time to keep from failing so bad at the game. They did it in a kind of joking way, like they thought something about my clumsiness was endearing. They probably eventually gave up and just told me to come sit by them.
But when I sat by them I was sitting with a whole group of high schoolers again. There may have been a general feeling of disappointment from everybody, as if nobody could believe I actually had to be on their team. I would really slow things down for them. Most of the people who thought this seemed to be guys. But there were a few girls who thought I was cute. They were happy to have me around.
I was sitting by myself again, a few meters in front of the team I had been sitting with. The gym looked different now. It was like there were window walls or high-up windows -- windows somewhere -- showing the black night sky outside.
I had the feeling I was supposed to be giving some kind of presentation. But there were a few girls in the front row of the team I had been sitting with. One or more of the girls started asking me questions, like advice questions about their lives or about paying bills. They asked partly because they thought I could help, but partly because they thought I was cute and they just wanted to talk to me. I was a little nervous about talking with them. I didn't want the boys to be jealous and start causing troubles for me.
I was now sitting right next to one of the girls. She was kind of skinny, with long, dark brown hair. She wore a dark, velvet mini-dress and something like a velvet rose in her hair. She started whispering her questions into my ear.
Dream #2
I was down in the basement of my family's house. My nephews were down there, too, running around and making messes out of things. Some of them ran into the laundry room. Others were messing around in the main part of the basement. I was trying to get them all to stop and just go back upstairs. But they wouldn't listen to me.
Finally they all just jumped into the bathroom. They left the door open a crack, so that I could see they were running around in there, making messes. I was getting really angry. At last, I opened the door and grabbed the first kid I could see -- my youngest nephew. I held him by his right arm and held him outward from me. He didn't struggle. It was like he was some solid, motionless object, like a coffee pot.
I walked up the stairs and into the living room. It was night. The only light in the living room came from the hallway. The living room seemed to be just as busy with kids as the basement had been. My brother-in-law was standing in front of the TV, which was shut off. I handed my nephew over to my brother-in-law.
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
school keys; religious euphemism; noodle resin; gerald wilkes booth
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I was in the lobby of a school, probably like an elementary school. The lobby was like an intersection for a number of hallways, some of which were probably more like covered outdoor walkways than hallways. The floor of the lobby was a kind of deep green. There were a lot of children and a few adults rushing about, as if a class were about to start, or as if school had just ended for the day.
Most of the people were probably heading for the front door, which was off and to my right. But I was heading toward a hallway that was across the lobby from me and up and to my left. But I saw that the double-doors to the hallway were closed. Since it was the end of the day, and the doors were closed, it likely meant the doors were locked.
I was probably going to head to the doors anyway, to see if I could get in through them. But some kids probably saw me. They probably knew that I would find the doors were locked. But they probably wanted me to get in. Either they spoke about getting me keys, or I could "read in their thoughts" that they were going to get me the keys, or I imagined that they were going to get me the keys. In my mind's eye, I could see a keyring kind of stuffed full of thin, flimsy keys.
Dream #2
I was walking out of some place like a grocery store. The cash registers were to my right, and a window wall was to my left. Up ahead of me was a smaller corridor that led to the automatic doors leading out of the grocery store. It was a sunny day, and the sunlight coming into the store made the store feel kind of cozy, even though it was really actually kind of run down.
As I was walking, there were two women walking and talking behind me. The women looked (even though I couldn't see them) young -- skinny, blonde, tan, pretty -- but a little worn out, somehow. And their voices sounded old and a bit stern and grizzled. The two women were talking about different choices of religion. But one of the women said she preferred not to use the term religion. Instead, she preferred to use some euphemistic term, like "spiritual pathway decision."
As I listened to the women talking, I approached the automatic doors. Leaning against a square column before the door was a wire-rack of free newspapers, possibly something like an apartment rental-ad newspaper.
Dream #3
I was in a big, but cluttered and kind of run down kitchen with a young man. There was a food prep counter in the center of the kitchen, off to my left. The man stood there, while I stood before a kind of old, heavy metal stove, watching a pot of noodles boil thickly.
The man began explaining something to me from behind the clutter on the food prep counter. It was probably about the right way for letting noodles boil. As the man continued his speech, my view backed up from the stove. The stove seemed to be cluttered with all kinds of things like sheets and gigantic rolls of Saran Wrap. But as the man continued his speech, which seemed to be mostly illustrations of how to mess up on boiling pasta, the stove top became cluttered with piles and piles of huge, boiling noodles.
The noodles stopped boiling. The man showed me some of the noodles. Some of the noodles were hollow cylinders, maybe 10cm long and 6cm in diameter. They were boiled really soft, and they all had traces of something like dirt or silt on their inside, bottom surfaces.
The man made me taste the noodles and see how bad they were. In particular the man had me note the "resin" (the dirt) that had been boiled into the noodles. I was a little surprised. For some reason, I'd thought resin would be something sweet and syrupy, not dirt-like. I wondered whether the man wasn't wrong in calling this stuff resin.
Dream #4
I was looking over a resume for somebody who wanted me to hire them for my company. The resume was just a sheet of paper with a picture on it. The picture took up almost the whole page, and it was bordered by some kind of zigzag drawing, possibly interspersed with crayon colors, like something a little child would draw. Below the photo were a few lines, on which were written a couple statements in huge, childlike handwriting.
The photo was of a man standing before a car like a DeLorean. The man stood on the driver's side of the car, right in front of the car's grill. The man was kind of old, bald, and a little egg-shaped. He wore an all-white uniform: white shirt, untucked, and white slacks.
The writing said something like, "My name is Gerald Wilkes Booth. Please don't tell anybody you know who I am or what my history is when you submit my application for this job."
I knew that Gerald Wilkes Booth was the man who assassinated John F. Kennedy. I wondered how someone could do something like that, and become so notorious, and then just think they could apply for a job without anybody catching on who they were. But I also began to worry. Now that I knew who this guy was, would other people now associate me with him?
One of my co-workers, possibly a boss of mine, had probably been standing over my left shoulder for a while, possibly explaining some stuff about this guy to me.
Dream #1
I was in the lobby of a school, probably like an elementary school. The lobby was like an intersection for a number of hallways, some of which were probably more like covered outdoor walkways than hallways. The floor of the lobby was a kind of deep green. There were a lot of children and a few adults rushing about, as if a class were about to start, or as if school had just ended for the day.
Most of the people were probably heading for the front door, which was off and to my right. But I was heading toward a hallway that was across the lobby from me and up and to my left. But I saw that the double-doors to the hallway were closed. Since it was the end of the day, and the doors were closed, it likely meant the doors were locked.
I was probably going to head to the doors anyway, to see if I could get in through them. But some kids probably saw me. They probably knew that I would find the doors were locked. But they probably wanted me to get in. Either they spoke about getting me keys, or I could "read in their thoughts" that they were going to get me the keys, or I imagined that they were going to get me the keys. In my mind's eye, I could see a keyring kind of stuffed full of thin, flimsy keys.
Dream #2
I was walking out of some place like a grocery store. The cash registers were to my right, and a window wall was to my left. Up ahead of me was a smaller corridor that led to the automatic doors leading out of the grocery store. It was a sunny day, and the sunlight coming into the store made the store feel kind of cozy, even though it was really actually kind of run down.
As I was walking, there were two women walking and talking behind me. The women looked (even though I couldn't see them) young -- skinny, blonde, tan, pretty -- but a little worn out, somehow. And their voices sounded old and a bit stern and grizzled. The two women were talking about different choices of religion. But one of the women said she preferred not to use the term religion. Instead, she preferred to use some euphemistic term, like "spiritual pathway decision."
As I listened to the women talking, I approached the automatic doors. Leaning against a square column before the door was a wire-rack of free newspapers, possibly something like an apartment rental-ad newspaper.
Dream #3
I was in a big, but cluttered and kind of run down kitchen with a young man. There was a food prep counter in the center of the kitchen, off to my left. The man stood there, while I stood before a kind of old, heavy metal stove, watching a pot of noodles boil thickly.
The man began explaining something to me from behind the clutter on the food prep counter. It was probably about the right way for letting noodles boil. As the man continued his speech, my view backed up from the stove. The stove seemed to be cluttered with all kinds of things like sheets and gigantic rolls of Saran Wrap. But as the man continued his speech, which seemed to be mostly illustrations of how to mess up on boiling pasta, the stove top became cluttered with piles and piles of huge, boiling noodles.
The noodles stopped boiling. The man showed me some of the noodles. Some of the noodles were hollow cylinders, maybe 10cm long and 6cm in diameter. They were boiled really soft, and they all had traces of something like dirt or silt on their inside, bottom surfaces.
The man made me taste the noodles and see how bad they were. In particular the man had me note the "resin" (the dirt) that had been boiled into the noodles. I was a little surprised. For some reason, I'd thought resin would be something sweet and syrupy, not dirt-like. I wondered whether the man wasn't wrong in calling this stuff resin.
Dream #4
I was looking over a resume for somebody who wanted me to hire them for my company. The resume was just a sheet of paper with a picture on it. The picture took up almost the whole page, and it was bordered by some kind of zigzag drawing, possibly interspersed with crayon colors, like something a little child would draw. Below the photo were a few lines, on which were written a couple statements in huge, childlike handwriting.
The photo was of a man standing before a car like a DeLorean. The man stood on the driver's side of the car, right in front of the car's grill. The man was kind of old, bald, and a little egg-shaped. He wore an all-white uniform: white shirt, untucked, and white slacks.
The writing said something like, "My name is Gerald Wilkes Booth. Please don't tell anybody you know who I am or what my history is when you submit my application for this job."
I knew that Gerald Wilkes Booth was the man who assassinated John F. Kennedy. I wondered how someone could do something like that, and become so notorious, and then just think they could apply for a job without anybody catching on who they were. But I also began to worry. Now that I knew who this guy was, would other people now associate me with him?
One of my co-workers, possibly a boss of mine, had probably been standing over my left shoulder for a while, possibly explaining some stuff about this guy to me.
Saturday, March 24, 2012
great grandmother suggests college
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I was in a bedroom on an upper floor of some small building, either a big house or a small apartment building. The room I was in was a rented room or a furnished apartment. Most of my view was taken up by my bed. All the bed had on it was a lot of white sheets. The rest of the room had a lot of white in it as well. But the room was kind of dim, as if only one light were on, somewhere behind me.
I got the feeling that my landlady (possibly an old landlady from my waking life) was coming for me. Possibly I hadn't paid the rent, or possibly I had done something bad in the room that my landlady needed to speak to me about. But I really didn't want to have to face my landlady. So I left as quick as I could, to avoid her.
Now, having walked away from the room, I was out on my great grandmother's lawn. The light was like late afternoon: a kind of cool blue-grey. I was trying to get away from the building (which wasn't there anymore) as quickly as I could. But my great grandma opened the front door of her house and called for me.
I turned around, still thinking that the person I was hearing was my landlady. I looked in through the shade of the doorway and saw my great grandma. She looked younger and healthier than she had been when she died -- maybe like she was in her early seventies, rather than in her late nineties. She was wearing a small, white sweatshirt.
Finally I realized where I was and who I was talking to. I turned (reluctantly?) and walked back toward my great grandma's house. My great grandma had me come inside. She sat me down in the living room. I sat in the chair she usually sat in while she was alive, and she sat in the chair to the right of that chair.
My great grandma asked me how I was, and then started talking to me about my life. She seemed to be suggesting to me that I go back to college. She asked me something like, "Have you ever considered Pace?"
The only Pace I knew of was Pace University in New York City. I hadn't actually considered that school. I didn't think I would ever consider the school, but I didn't want to tell my great grandma that, and seem to be contradicting her. My great grandma may already have seemed a little frustrated with me somehow, possibly because I was definitely being wishy-washy about going back to school.
I now noticed that my bookbag was sitting on the footstool in front of the chair. It had popped wide open. A new package of baby's diapers sat positioned about halfway out of the bag. I knew the diapers were mine -- like I had bought them for myself to wear.
I didn't want my great grandma to see the diapers and know they were for me. I tried to hide them. But now there was another new package of diapers, in a kind of thin, plastic shopping bag, right next to my bag. There were two big, new packages of diapers right in front of me! The package coming from my bookbag was colored red. The one in the shopping bag was green.
I wanted to put the diapers on right now. But I didn't want my great grandma to see me doing so. I was seriously thinking of doing something like hiding behind a chair so that I could change into a diaper without leaving the living room. But I didn't think that would work. I was half-lazily (like in a reverie) and half-frantically trying to figure a way to put a diaper on.
But suddenly I was in my great grandma's bathroom. I figured I must have gotten there by making some excuse to my great grandma about how I needed to go to the bathroom. I had all the bags with me, and I was putting on a diaper.
I looked at my diapered bottom in some (???) mirror. I noticed that the diaper-bottom was torn. It was like the leggings of the diaper were like the stitching around the leggings of panties, and that all the padding of the diaper had pulled away from the legging. Parts of the backing may have been shredding a bit as well, creating a striped or netted look.
I was now in another place. I may have just been with a group of friends, taking care of some task. We were now coming back home, as if we all lived in the same dorm-like apartment. I was rushing down to my room in the basement with a feeling of happiness, the brisk excitement of having been out with friends.
The basement felt full of activity, like there were a number of people who lived down there, and like they all shared some kind of common space like a living room, along one wall of which were the doors to the individual bedrooms. I ran into my room, but I left the door half-open.
I looked at myself in a full-length, kind of narrow mirror on the wall. I realized I needed to change my clothes quick! I couldn't quite believe it, but I was dressed like a girl! I wore a tiny, lavender-colored skirt, a baby blue shirt, and something like white nylons or fishnet stockings. I was also wearing a diaper, which I may have peed in. The diaper was visible from under the skirt. My body may also have been the body of a skinny, teenage girl, even though I was still myself, and a guy.
I knew I needed to change before anybody saw me. (It didn't occur to me that, if I looked like this coming into my room, everybody I was out with must have seen me already.) But as I was changing, my brother may have come into the room. His only reaction to me may have been that I needed to stop screwing around. He was impatient for us to get somewhere. And my slowness was really making him disappointed in me.
Dream #1
I was in a bedroom on an upper floor of some small building, either a big house or a small apartment building. The room I was in was a rented room or a furnished apartment. Most of my view was taken up by my bed. All the bed had on it was a lot of white sheets. The rest of the room had a lot of white in it as well. But the room was kind of dim, as if only one light were on, somewhere behind me.
I got the feeling that my landlady (possibly an old landlady from my waking life) was coming for me. Possibly I hadn't paid the rent, or possibly I had done something bad in the room that my landlady needed to speak to me about. But I really didn't want to have to face my landlady. So I left as quick as I could, to avoid her.
Now, having walked away from the room, I was out on my great grandmother's lawn. The light was like late afternoon: a kind of cool blue-grey. I was trying to get away from the building (which wasn't there anymore) as quickly as I could. But my great grandma opened the front door of her house and called for me.
I turned around, still thinking that the person I was hearing was my landlady. I looked in through the shade of the doorway and saw my great grandma. She looked younger and healthier than she had been when she died -- maybe like she was in her early seventies, rather than in her late nineties. She was wearing a small, white sweatshirt.
Finally I realized where I was and who I was talking to. I turned (reluctantly?) and walked back toward my great grandma's house. My great grandma had me come inside. She sat me down in the living room. I sat in the chair she usually sat in while she was alive, and she sat in the chair to the right of that chair.
My great grandma asked me how I was, and then started talking to me about my life. She seemed to be suggesting to me that I go back to college. She asked me something like, "Have you ever considered Pace?"
The only Pace I knew of was Pace University in New York City. I hadn't actually considered that school. I didn't think I would ever consider the school, but I didn't want to tell my great grandma that, and seem to be contradicting her. My great grandma may already have seemed a little frustrated with me somehow, possibly because I was definitely being wishy-washy about going back to school.
I now noticed that my bookbag was sitting on the footstool in front of the chair. It had popped wide open. A new package of baby's diapers sat positioned about halfway out of the bag. I knew the diapers were mine -- like I had bought them for myself to wear.
I didn't want my great grandma to see the diapers and know they were for me. I tried to hide them. But now there was another new package of diapers, in a kind of thin, plastic shopping bag, right next to my bag. There were two big, new packages of diapers right in front of me! The package coming from my bookbag was colored red. The one in the shopping bag was green.
I wanted to put the diapers on right now. But I didn't want my great grandma to see me doing so. I was seriously thinking of doing something like hiding behind a chair so that I could change into a diaper without leaving the living room. But I didn't think that would work. I was half-lazily (like in a reverie) and half-frantically trying to figure a way to put a diaper on.
But suddenly I was in my great grandma's bathroom. I figured I must have gotten there by making some excuse to my great grandma about how I needed to go to the bathroom. I had all the bags with me, and I was putting on a diaper.
I looked at my diapered bottom in some (???) mirror. I noticed that the diaper-bottom was torn. It was like the leggings of the diaper were like the stitching around the leggings of panties, and that all the padding of the diaper had pulled away from the legging. Parts of the backing may have been shredding a bit as well, creating a striped or netted look.
I was now in another place. I may have just been with a group of friends, taking care of some task. We were now coming back home, as if we all lived in the same dorm-like apartment. I was rushing down to my room in the basement with a feeling of happiness, the brisk excitement of having been out with friends.
The basement felt full of activity, like there were a number of people who lived down there, and like they all shared some kind of common space like a living room, along one wall of which were the doors to the individual bedrooms. I ran into my room, but I left the door half-open.
I looked at myself in a full-length, kind of narrow mirror on the wall. I realized I needed to change my clothes quick! I couldn't quite believe it, but I was dressed like a girl! I wore a tiny, lavender-colored skirt, a baby blue shirt, and something like white nylons or fishnet stockings. I was also wearing a diaper, which I may have peed in. The diaper was visible from under the skirt. My body may also have been the body of a skinny, teenage girl, even though I was still myself, and a guy.
I knew I needed to change before anybody saw me. (It didn't occur to me that, if I looked like this coming into my room, everybody I was out with must have seen me already.) But as I was changing, my brother may have come into the room. His only reaction to me may have been that I needed to stop screwing around. He was impatient for us to get somewhere. And my slowness was really making him disappointed in me.
Thursday, March 15, 2012
jim marrs -- sections l and m; cranberry juice; tarantino's conspiracy theory
Good morning, everybody.
Dream #1
I was in a basement room, reading a book from the light of a window. The window was kind of small and high up on the wall. The light it let in was dim.
The book I was reading was by conspiracy theorist Jim Marrs. I had finished the main part of the book. I was now leafing through the appendix. The pages of the appendix were all glossy and black, with white lettering. There were pictures of outer space and the earth on almost every page. But the earth didn't look like the earth, but more like a foamy, blue ball with landforms represented on it.
I had flipped to section L of the appendix. Marrs had written that he was writing some new information in response to requests by some of his readers. He wrote that section L of the appendix had been meant for this originally, but that Marrs hadn't finished what he'd been writing for section L had never been completed. Marrs would now include all the new information in section M, which was, apparently, more like a polished essay.
I flipped to section M. The first thing Marrs was talking about was some piece of land in China. Marrs wondered why China had bought this piece of land. Why, Marrs wondered, did China make such a big deal about needing this land? But then, Marrs pointed out, China sold this land, first to the Germans, and then to the Federal Reserve.
This was all apparently some big scheme for globalization. The illustrations first showed the corner of the globe with China on it, with some kind of yellowy spotlight on the land bought. Another illustration showed some round view of the earth with three landforms, thin, kind of crescent shaped, seeming to be jittering together like matter inside a cell. There may have been one more distant picture of the earth.
Dream #2
I was in a dark house. I was in the kitchen. I was myself, but I may have been a bit younger than I am IWL. The house was an apartment. But it was a really big apartment, and multi-storied.
The husband and wife who owned the apartment had had me over for the night. There may have been a girl there, as well. At some point in the night, I remembered, the husband and wife had asked me if I wanted anything to drink. I told them if they had cranberry juice, I'd like some, but if they didn't, it wasn't any worry.
The husband and wife had then told me to wait before I said something was no worry. They had called down to somebody, who quickly ran out and bought a jug of cranberry juice. The husband and wife told me I could eat anything that was in the house, and that when something I wanted wasn't in the house, I could get it ordered.
I was now in the kitchen, in the dark, looking for the cranberry juice. I fumbled around on the kitchen counters and in a few of the above-counter cupboards. I then headed toward the middle of the kitchen. On either side of the kitchen were doorways out into rooms. I could see that the space on my right had a large living area with a staircase to the upper floor. The area to my left probably ran through a number of bedrooms.
I could almost hear the girl, husband, and wife laughing at me now. I felt like they were wondering why I was so greedy. Why did I want to get more cranberry juice than I'd been given? I felt like some kind of glutton now. But I couldn't resist it.
Finally I realized that the cranberry juice would be in the fridge. I opened the door of the fridge. Inside was a transparent plastic jug, shaped like a Minute Maid jug, of cranberry juice. The jug was half full. I grabbed it to pull it out of the fridge.
Dream #3
I was in a living room with my mom, sister, nephews, and niece. The living room was really big, but barren. The floors were wooden. Plenty of pale white-gold light flowed in through the windows.
For some reason we were all laying on the floor, under blankets or sleeping bags. We each had our own little space, but we were still kind of gathered together near the front, left corner of the room.
I had been emotionally cold, even mean, to my nephews and niece lately. So now I felt the need to make up for it. I stood up and went to one of my nephews, maybe my second oldest nephew. I spoke with him a little bit. Then I spoke with my niece a little bit. They both stayed laying under their blankets while I spoke with them.
My sister then spoke to me. She was laying down on some small mattress that she barely fit onto. It was also, somehow, like she was laying inside a car, maybe in the back of a car, even while she was in the living room.
My sister told me, "I've got to get ready for my wedding. I've gotten a rainbow dress. But I haven't picked it up yet. It wasn't ready until just now."
While my sister went off, out of the room, I spoke some more with my niece. My niece stood-sat on my legs as I sat on the ground and had my knees together and drawn up. My niece would lean her back backwards over my knees. She was also listening to some device I had, like an iPod or iPhone.
I had been playing some kind of YouTube video for my niece. It was of some old TV show, like from the 1950s. My niece wasn't watching the video at all. She had some white headphones in her ears, and she'd listen to the video. But I was holding the device, sort of looking at it.
The video was over. I tried to find another one for my niece. This was also an old show. But it was in color: a lot of sparkling pinks. I asked my niece at some point if these videos were boring. She said they weren't boring. They sounded fine. I figured that as long as the videos had an interesting sounding story, my niece would be happy.
My sister may have come back. I was standing at some odd corner of the living room for a moment, facing the thin end of a wall dividing the living room from a hallway.
I was now in the front, right corner of a living room again. It was probably late afternoon. It was dark blue outside. But the living room was lit with slightly dim, warm, incandescent light. The room was furnished now, instead of being barren.
I stood before a table that had some food on it. I was apparently at some party, like a holiday party, probably at my family's house. I was trying to decide what kind of food I wanted. I saw enchiladas, either on the table or in my head. I may also have seen spaghetti.
I now heard Quentin Tarantino behind me. Tarantino was talking with a circle of people. He was giving them some conspiracy theory speech. I can't remember what it was about. But Tarantino then asked everybody, "And what do you think they linked it all together under? -----, which is a well-known supporter of the Ku Klux Klan! This is all about white supremacy!"
Tarantino continued his speech. I decided to join the circle. I didn't quite believe anything Tarantino was saying. But he made it sound interesting. And it was, after all, Quentin Tarantino I was getting a chance to listen to.
But right before I got to the circle, my second oldest nephew came up to me and started making goofy noises and showing me something on his Nintendo DS. I was still trying to be nice. So I spent a few moments listening to my nephew and being goofy with him.
I then joined the circle -- kind of. I felt like I had to stand at a distance and act like I wasn't really paying attention to what was being said. I had a feeling everybody in the circle thought I was a spy. So if I paid too close attention, they'd think I was memorizing what they said, so I could inform on them.
So I stood just outside the circle, turned at a kind of angle. I rested my right arm up on the mantle of a fireplace. I may also have rested an iPad there. The fireplace and wall were of thick, grey stone.
Dream #1
I was in a basement room, reading a book from the light of a window. The window was kind of small and high up on the wall. The light it let in was dim.
The book I was reading was by conspiracy theorist Jim Marrs. I had finished the main part of the book. I was now leafing through the appendix. The pages of the appendix were all glossy and black, with white lettering. There were pictures of outer space and the earth on almost every page. But the earth didn't look like the earth, but more like a foamy, blue ball with landforms represented on it.
I had flipped to section L of the appendix. Marrs had written that he was writing some new information in response to requests by some of his readers. He wrote that section L of the appendix had been meant for this originally, but that Marrs hadn't finished what he'd been writing for section L had never been completed. Marrs would now include all the new information in section M, which was, apparently, more like a polished essay.
I flipped to section M. The first thing Marrs was talking about was some piece of land in China. Marrs wondered why China had bought this piece of land. Why, Marrs wondered, did China make such a big deal about needing this land? But then, Marrs pointed out, China sold this land, first to the Germans, and then to the Federal Reserve.
This was all apparently some big scheme for globalization. The illustrations first showed the corner of the globe with China on it, with some kind of yellowy spotlight on the land bought. Another illustration showed some round view of the earth with three landforms, thin, kind of crescent shaped, seeming to be jittering together like matter inside a cell. There may have been one more distant picture of the earth.
Dream #2
I was in a dark house. I was in the kitchen. I was myself, but I may have been a bit younger than I am IWL. The house was an apartment. But it was a really big apartment, and multi-storied.
The husband and wife who owned the apartment had had me over for the night. There may have been a girl there, as well. At some point in the night, I remembered, the husband and wife had asked me if I wanted anything to drink. I told them if they had cranberry juice, I'd like some, but if they didn't, it wasn't any worry.
The husband and wife had then told me to wait before I said something was no worry. They had called down to somebody, who quickly ran out and bought a jug of cranberry juice. The husband and wife told me I could eat anything that was in the house, and that when something I wanted wasn't in the house, I could get it ordered.
I was now in the kitchen, in the dark, looking for the cranberry juice. I fumbled around on the kitchen counters and in a few of the above-counter cupboards. I then headed toward the middle of the kitchen. On either side of the kitchen were doorways out into rooms. I could see that the space on my right had a large living area with a staircase to the upper floor. The area to my left probably ran through a number of bedrooms.
I could almost hear the girl, husband, and wife laughing at me now. I felt like they were wondering why I was so greedy. Why did I want to get more cranberry juice than I'd been given? I felt like some kind of glutton now. But I couldn't resist it.
Finally I realized that the cranberry juice would be in the fridge. I opened the door of the fridge. Inside was a transparent plastic jug, shaped like a Minute Maid jug, of cranberry juice. The jug was half full. I grabbed it to pull it out of the fridge.
Dream #3
I was in a living room with my mom, sister, nephews, and niece. The living room was really big, but barren. The floors were wooden. Plenty of pale white-gold light flowed in through the windows.
For some reason we were all laying on the floor, under blankets or sleeping bags. We each had our own little space, but we were still kind of gathered together near the front, left corner of the room.
I had been emotionally cold, even mean, to my nephews and niece lately. So now I felt the need to make up for it. I stood up and went to one of my nephews, maybe my second oldest nephew. I spoke with him a little bit. Then I spoke with my niece a little bit. They both stayed laying under their blankets while I spoke with them.
My sister then spoke to me. She was laying down on some small mattress that she barely fit onto. It was also, somehow, like she was laying inside a car, maybe in the back of a car, even while she was in the living room.
My sister told me, "I've got to get ready for my wedding. I've gotten a rainbow dress. But I haven't picked it up yet. It wasn't ready until just now."
While my sister went off, out of the room, I spoke some more with my niece. My niece stood-sat on my legs as I sat on the ground and had my knees together and drawn up. My niece would lean her back backwards over my knees. She was also listening to some device I had, like an iPod or iPhone.
I had been playing some kind of YouTube video for my niece. It was of some old TV show, like from the 1950s. My niece wasn't watching the video at all. She had some white headphones in her ears, and she'd listen to the video. But I was holding the device, sort of looking at it.
The video was over. I tried to find another one for my niece. This was also an old show. But it was in color: a lot of sparkling pinks. I asked my niece at some point if these videos were boring. She said they weren't boring. They sounded fine. I figured that as long as the videos had an interesting sounding story, my niece would be happy.
My sister may have come back. I was standing at some odd corner of the living room for a moment, facing the thin end of a wall dividing the living room from a hallway.
I was now in the front, right corner of a living room again. It was probably late afternoon. It was dark blue outside. But the living room was lit with slightly dim, warm, incandescent light. The room was furnished now, instead of being barren.
I stood before a table that had some food on it. I was apparently at some party, like a holiday party, probably at my family's house. I was trying to decide what kind of food I wanted. I saw enchiladas, either on the table or in my head. I may also have seen spaghetti.
I now heard Quentin Tarantino behind me. Tarantino was talking with a circle of people. He was giving them some conspiracy theory speech. I can't remember what it was about. But Tarantino then asked everybody, "And what do you think they linked it all together under? -----, which is a well-known supporter of the Ku Klux Klan! This is all about white supremacy!"
Tarantino continued his speech. I decided to join the circle. I didn't quite believe anything Tarantino was saying. But he made it sound interesting. And it was, after all, Quentin Tarantino I was getting a chance to listen to.
But right before I got to the circle, my second oldest nephew came up to me and started making goofy noises and showing me something on his Nintendo DS. I was still trying to be nice. So I spent a few moments listening to my nephew and being goofy with him.
I then joined the circle -- kind of. I felt like I had to stand at a distance and act like I wasn't really paying attention to what was being said. I had a feeling everybody in the circle thought I was a spy. So if I paid too close attention, they'd think I was memorizing what they said, so I could inform on them.
So I stood just outside the circle, turned at a kind of angle. I rested my right arm up on the mantle of a fireplace. I may also have rested an iPad there. The fireplace and wall were of thick, grey stone.
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